1925 Snopes Monkey Trial

Much  later  we're squabbling over monkepd virusJohn Snopes  "Guiltyof teaching  evoluluon

Make It Fresh Make it Often!

 RAISINS ARE  GOOD  AND VIRTUALLY  CALORY  FREE.  MAKE IN AN  AFTERNOON    CRANK UP  THH  OVEN  TO  225.   THIS  WILL TAKE  ABOUT  4  H0URS

NOW,  SPRAY  A  BAKING  SHEET  AND  HAVING  

OH1!  PUT

Summer Picnic Season!

 IH INAS  ARRIVED  AND THE BEST SUB  ANY WHERE IS  JERSEY MIK E S   O

.

BACK  SOON

(Ivana Trump COD was a fall down a flight of stairs at herManhattan home

 After lunch at  anTtalian resta.  HHhhhhum

dEAF ON A SUNDAY

CAUSE:  THE SOUTH  BAY  NEW  ORLEANS  JAZZ CLUB'.  

THOSE  DUDES  ,  THEN  CAN  DO  LOUD    FROM  NOON  TO4 PM  

WHO'D  EVER  IMAGINE  A DANCE  STUDIO  COULD  CRANK  IT  0UT  LIKE  THAT?

The Horror

 At  METS  STADIUM  A BEER  IS  $18

wHAT.S IN A NAME?

 Jaque  PEPIN  FAMOUS CHEF - HAD TO HALV EHAVEEN NICK NAMED  JAQUE  PUTAINE

mULE THAT BR0KE 0UR HAIRDRESSER'S LEG

 

DALE WAS ON AN ANNUAL  COWBOY ROUND UPWHEN  MOLLY  WHEN TMAD.  HE HAS  2  MORE WEEKS

AV0D  WHITE MULESatall  cost  YOU'RE  SAFE  ENOUGH  IN  THE  TONSUREAL  PARLOR  OF

EL  SEGUDO

0

LOUD THUMPS

ARE ALL WE'RE  GETING  HERE AND  LANGUID  AT  THAT.

AT  2 A M  THOUGH....

  

tHE BIRTHDAY GIRL

 Imelda  Marcus is 93  and I  thought  she  was  dead.   Who  knew???

Himself and I 39 years ago - w ere marriied

 Dinner at  Hudson  House  

I'vealways  said   he  picked that date so that  the  fireworks  were fore HIM

39 years and still married

Reading Is th sgreateGifT of them all

SAID  aNYATAt  JOY.ACTOR

Once I learned how  Iwanevnever boredoor  orloneonltO

lo

re

Of Car Wash Dogs and a Dog show

 I  Googled  Maltese Dog  - you can ,too -and there was a car wash dog.!  If you don't  don'tt know them seek them out!  you will miss a huge guffaw!

The Westminster Kennel Club

This charms  me every time it comes  around.  The dogs  are so clearly  thoroughly enjoying themselves.

I enjoy the handlers.  Every one of  them has developed a flatfoofooted thumping "run"As a  general rule all of them the could run they should run their beasts a lot more.  than they do.  And I know  this by the  the thumping of  the audetorium  floor'   Thud. thud!

Tonight they setttle Best  in Show  and I cant wait.  for BEST IN SHOW!

Flammboyance - - A Toipiary Menagerie

 South Bay Botanical  Gardens  87  acres 

to walk the dog  9 to 5 for  urination on -the  topiary.  The

topiary is filled with butterflies:

There is  a  1,5 mile wa walking  trail  to make sure you've seen it all,  The Museum thoughtfully included a map for such as a  troop of Monkeys

Swarm of Butterflies

Pack of Dogs

Fluffl/e of Rabbitl

Flamboyance of  Flamingos

Admission $15

In Which My Sister Pays A Visit to the people Next door

 Our next door neighbors have a particularly obnoxious wind  chime.  It sounds like someone was banging a pair of woodenDutch  shoes together.  It is by no means musical.  She can't stand it so out the door she boldly went to  wreak sure and swift justice.  It is particularly annoying because it never stops.On and on it goes  Clop Clop

If they were home  they weren't showing  themselves.  A fine lecture was in the  offimg andig - I could hear                                         it from  our kitchen  window  where I stood listening.

Back she came,  disappointed  at the   lack  of an  audience.  Next visit I'l  tag along. Theres ' safety  i

And I hate  that thing  j  ust  as much she does. 

It never Offering them a free trip to a wood chipper might be coming  on a little  strong.  But  damn I hate that thing, too.

Today's adventure - South Bay Botical Gardens 

Sister dearest1

 Picked her up at baggage claim and took  her her to 

Scottys on the Strand for the proximity to the sea and  dynamic view of the ocean

The food is actually quite good and  savory.  

Today it's Thurs. Writers noon to two and dinner  out  Location to be announced

wh;

Tomorrow, not today

Jane will be landing at 11 am  for lunch at Tin Roof Bistro.  Now I need to pick through the menu  

Bliss 

Great Excitement!

 My sister is coming for a visit for Richies birthday.  We l laugh  a lot.  Il'll save you some cake.  Maybe

Thursday Is My Favorite Day of the Week

Because it's Writers Workshop.  Will report today' adventures when the're over\\tThere

I ccan report lots of screaming but it was of joy

New (to me) treatment

 Its Medihoney  more tomorrow    Wednesday  Not a Rx drug  $12,00

Nearly Fanous

The good folks at Gerber decided to have a contest for the most beatiful baby and until unti my Dad  got ahold of  her.

Think of the rolties over  90 years!

Blue Water Grill

665 N, Harbor Drive amidst the masts of a jillion sail boats.  No boat owners offered  us a ride' "us' being Dee and Richie and self.

The three of us started with aJumbo Prawn Codktail  $16

Both guys had the lemon pepper Mahi Mahi $30.50

I had overly breaded Crab carab  Cake 

Dessert:Key Lime Pie  and Creme Brulee  all shared equally

The three of of us racked the tab - $200.94  The wines did the damage

 

Did you ever hear these?

The dogs bark but the caravan goes on  Arab saying 

Good girls keep diaries    Bad girls don't have time  (for got source)

Tweaking Mother Nature

 I learned this morning via BoredPanda that you can make more green onions simply by putting the root end in a  glass jar with clean water.  Other veggies include garlic, celery. lettuce,in addional to your green onion.  For the really ambitous I grew a 40ft avocado tree that does bear fruit

This ssounds like a great primary dchool project,

BoredPanda on Breast milk

They said it is as good  as Mothers ,  Obviosly they never met Pat Brodski who frequntly pruclaimed, "Ah, GIN - Mother's milk!

Cynacism

and how I love it...This popped into my largely empty head last night- what if funeral homes paid for all 18 year old's guns 

Plot sales could offer one of those You are invited to a lobster lunch gratis with a full tour of the Eternal Rest  We'll pay for a full tank. for your car

ONE QUEEN;TWO CROWNS

 For her upcoming Platinum Jubilee Queen will need (?)    two crowns - For ceremonies she will sport the St' Edward and   fort  he return the head will carry the Imperial crown  

The article I read said Plenty of sunshine. Plume o f  and sunshine warm air .

Less Llb  Another prediction:   3Billon to  will be spent over the weekend  16,000 street parties      

Tourists be warned Terrible  Travel   Trains, planes, The Tube, and roads

Many may sneer at the Brit Way.  Sene any   photos of children massacred?      

So you going?  We should be safe enough The put teeth in their gun laws .  The NRA doesn't rule; them - the Queen does that.

                                                  

Not my circus, not my monkey pox. 

A Modest Proposal

That the NRA go trough  their files and weed  out the f0llowing: 

 Males a 18 and under that be kicked out of the NRA..  

Statistics (and TV news)reps I just cited'

Meanwhile the Senate is  votimg  to change law - You have to be 21 to buy a gun and

pass  a comprensive  menttal  testing by a psychiatrist.  Gun sellers to pay.

The Horrow in Texa

 There is no excuse for anyone to carry arms.

You have to  work from inside ladies. " Your sex life just died" works -if  your partner does like it

A thougt

A falling knife has no handle 

That SO' 50's!

The BullPen

310 Avenue  I

31o 375 9

I've always loved this place even when it hadnt ye't become retro yet.,Steak and Martinis  "                                                                                                                                          "                                                                     Richie and I  sauntered in last night what  we ate-Himself dined as follow sGin and Tonic

Medalions of beef  $37.   Come s with  Soup or salad, mashed or baked.  potaHis  wine with the meal - Stone Cellar Cab SAuv $8'.5

Hendrix well gin  $.13 makes a damned fine martin[.   

House PinotGrigigio $8..50

Tourdinous $42 

$$: !28,66Having

HAVING dined in considerableat  ease-in red Naugahyde booths  we gave  simultaneous  belches and went home  

Oh,?what'sf0r dinne tonighr?  

You might recognise it  especiaially if you  found  yoursefl  dining on Avenue I

Ya can't always get what you want

Man says wistfully - I want a woman like  Melania Tump who is beaut]ful l'does all of the housework cookin and sings whille she works

Now thar you've had a good laugh Say thanks to boredpanda.com

Fred

 Fred is our  10 yo tuxedo  male cat '  When h e came up from the back yard HE WAS SKINNY AS A MALNOURISHED RAT, WENT ON WENY ON   wTO eighed  22lbs and  then all of a   sudden he looked like there was less of h him. I'm desperate to  rhe s lost at least 2lb ,Iand TI'h.  in the exam  room     We waited for the tech.  First thing the tech does IS WEIGH  FRED    

 NEW WEIGH?  24  LB.

Have a cast on left hand which doesn't do much if anything 0f anything for either.

The only electric fire engine in America

If you don't count Mesa. AZ 

Howard County - no state given.  Maybe afraid it will be stolen?

I assume you can pop by Station 82, Hollywood FOR A LOOK AT YOUR TAX DOLLARS AT WORK

 The article mentioned Station 82 which reminded me  of Station 42 (Rosemead) where Cousin Doug reigned as Fire Captain

As it turned out, he would be of several - his brother Perry; and more Doug was the most daring.  I saw him run across Turn 3, Ontario Motor Speedway; ,  

At a family barbeque  some one yelled the house next door was on fire  Running hard in flip flops he grabbed the garden hose and  rammed it through the open kirchen window and put out the fire

On a braver level  at an off-r0ad race at Riversiide Richie and Doug took 5 or 6 neighborhood kids (on my press pass) Ever resolute he had bought  an old yellow school bus.  Kids    loved it

 

Baby Lilah, of Galena Il

 She's a l little baby with a big hunger and demands FOOD! - every 3 hours,  from a baby food  

supplier,  but after volunteering to ship from here to there I was told the freezer was filled so no worries

Now I want the details!

The Judds finally gave some details -  Ma used "a fire arm"  while visiting her daughter at her the daughter's house.  Now that's all well and good bu:   rifle- or or pistol?    Caliber?

Will try to get floors plans to the house

Oh to be hip

 Am I

Am I The Asshole Here?

use with care; you might not like the answer  but you will be cutting-edge hip

At the doctrs office

I HAD A 9:15  APP WHICH SET  MY TEETH GRINDING.    WRITERS DON'T GET UP AT  HOURS LIKE    THAT!

    BUT DOCTOR LESSER  WAS IN FINE  FETTLE   i .PULLED M YPANTS UP ;  TH HE GAVE TT A CURSORY L OOkAND SAID; : yOU NEED TO TAKE THAT  TO A REAL DOC ..!

 

An idYL Sunday

Winning bettor  reaped $1.8 million  - can you imagine the size of his wager/? 

SUMMER FUN/SPORT KILLED WITH 

A SWIMMING POOL DOESN''T TURN BLUE WHEN YOU RELEASE A CHEMICAL AND PEE IN IT.  TEST TO BE SURE

Mother's' Day Sunday -Among -Other -fine dining spots  at Ports'O-Call.  The Sunday Brunch is very nearly perfect - outdoor seating in Summer if .  desired.    The view is of  the main channel with every thing  from -sail boats to oil tankers.  It's not them that makes Ports my favorite - free Champaign!  for as long you can remain vertical.  Thank God Richie isn't that fond of it.  

Over the years I've be come fond of the Ladies room attendant and have marvelous chats..

We were there one Mother's  Brunch Sunday    "How many plates today I asked?" and she said "3,000"

NEVER BET AGAINST ME

Kentucky Derby Today.  For this  one, my younger sister and  and I are  going at tooth and nail - no $ money too much.  We have rich  husbands who like  to keep us happy.  They are very afraid of us.  Very.

Sports  report post  race.

I still  love grey horses and there will be 3 - 3 today!!!

My bet for is   Charge It  #8  13 to1

Ti

D mAYO HAS C OME AND GONE

L EAVING ONLY  MEMORIES OF A  DYNAMITE DUO  OFMARIACHS AND THE DISCREET BELCH  EVERY NOW AND THEN.

RICHIE ASKED AND THEY PLAYED LA BIKINA MY FAVORITE OF ALL TIME..

LAS BRISAS USED  TO HAVE LIVE MUSIC  WEEKENDS  HIS NAME WAS ROBERTO.

TO  MY AMAZMENT/AMUSMENT  ROBRER TO KEPT BEGGING ME TO RUN OFF TO MEXICO WITH  HIM,  IF HE WASN'T  UGLIER THAN A MUD FENCE  I MIGHI HAVE GIVEN HIS PROPOSAL AT LEAST A NANOSECOND BEFORE SCREAMING IN HORR0R.  I HOPE HE AND HIS SUPER THICK GLASES   POT BELLY, , AND SO MUCH MORE ARE SAFE AND HAPPY.  IN MEXICO' .  WE ALWAYS MENTION YOU.IN CASE YOUARE LISTENING

  I WONDER IF HE EVER THINKS OF ME...WE WILL NEVER KNOW.

'LL

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

Today is Cinco de  Mayo And South Bay Writers Workshop

My cup runs over   Come, meet us at Las Brisas  1969 Artesia.

Good food. mariachi!  

If your'e planning a tequila marathon  Don.t.  Think of your loved ones

Ralphs take the day

 With a refill of two counters - cheeses  and olives.  That's where the muffuletta dwells .

   AND  happpy  I am to  see it. even though it has a sour taste

Naome's'funeral is Monday

Toe to toe with Ralphs and Trader Joe

 Trader Joe touts gourmet goods;  Ralphs does'nn't; speaking generally.

Today I saw that Ralphs had put a card  on the table - it was a plastic container holding a generous portion of Muffuletta for sandwichs  A classic  ingredient in Old Town New Orleans.  I recomemnd Center Grocery

And in closing today:  Naomi Judd is still dead of what no one knows

Naomie Judd

Digging furiously to find  A CAUSE OF DEATH FOR HER.  AND CAN'T.  MADDENING BUT  I WILL.  AND THEN I'LL TELL YOU

update    TIME OF DEATH WAS  2:20 Sat. afternoon

I Knew They Can' Dance A Lick But Still

This is going too far . .French now fear the weekend dance floor.  There is a faceless assailant  who swiftly  sneaks up on ladies and gives them a shot in the arm with unknown contents.  The  only way the victim finds out is a red dot surrounding a bruise the next day.

Now having  been  ON a Fr. dance floor I can tell you with certainty that    frogs don't dance; they hop.  Up and down hop  hop hop.

But it is   rather a harsh punishment   don' you     agree?                           Nausea cramps - I forget   

Maybe  LePen  can   do something.                                                 

Nothing To Say

 So Won't

Stop! I'm In Stitches!

In the course of an ordinary slip and fall, I put a gash in the back of my head that required stitches aka in today's world as "staples."It wasn't  particully painful until I went to bed - right on the 5 staples.  Ow!  But after that they got over themselves  and life went on.

Today they'd done the required seven days and could come out.  The ER house doctor called to tell me to come into the ER for staples   Doctor calls patient -STOP PRESSES!

It was painful but nothing you could't stand.

I'm not in stitches now.  Turn off the presses.

 

Your Relative is in jail scam

This happened   yesterday.  Phone rings.  male  identifies  as "your favorite nephew"  

Sad story ensues ;  nose broken; four   stitches in jail; needs bail; don't tell parents (My real nephew is 40 )

Enter lawyer on the phone  explaining how to get bail from LA to Conn.

                                                                                     D'ont

Al and Me

 The way I found out about this was when the local paper started   running a column    of famous peoples birthdays that   day         And there we both were.  Same  year, month 

What else might we  share?t ?      Place of birth - East Harlem.

Axtel General Hospiital Newton, Kansas   Free bushel of good Kansas wheat with every birth.

One of several actors to win an    Oscar, Emmy, Tony.  I -once walked across   the stage in a little   theater    production                      

         H`APPY BIRTHAY AL !  

widh

widita, N            

Perhaps A Good Idea

To  share birthdays by halving  the times between them.  Here is an example  using family. My younger  sister 's in a suburb near Chicago.   You know where I am. Redondo Breach -  It makes sense to meet in t somewhere  middle somewhere agreeable to both. But where would we go?  We  almost simultaneously said  South Texas  where we have cousins we both love.  Meet in San Antinio.

But WHEN?  And I said "Split the difference

She's early November; I'm end of April so  `April to Nov is 8 months - July

When South Texas is roaringly hot.  No worries     - all of Texas is air conditioned

Now we can start this great plan with Sis this July. or not.  We both love to party...

s

ba hum bug

URGENT CARE  DOING WHAT  TT   DOES BEST -

   REFERAL ! S

Bored Panda They're having a good day today

I like this as it was clearly well-researched = bed superstitions all things

Never put your hat on your bed --Never sleep with your head to the North

Always get in and out and out of your bed on the same side (What? you could get lost?)

If married, be wary of this one - sleep with an axe under  the bed.

Exiting to let you go to boredpanda.com 

2 p.m. doctor's appt.  Routine

New Zealand, New Senior Hubby

Seniors all over are bored and looking for amusement so, I read some where they are open to various hobbies.  In their groups they are making coffins .

My own fa-in-law and his brother having priced them decided to make their own, "After all we are carpenters."  But nothing happened and in the end; they went commercial.

Tip - 

our   local supermarket - Ralph's is having their periodic sale  of cocktail shrimp.  Get there if you possibly can  lovely fat pink shrimp ' $5

Happy Easter!

                             May you find all of your eggs! 

IN WHICH I IINVENTNVENT A SANDWICH

You will need:

1/slice of sour dough bread, toasted

i container cole slaw

1/2 lb. mortadella

While your bread slice toasts get out the slaw and mortadella

Spread the cole slaw thickly on the freshly toasted bread and "blanket" it with the mortadella.  .Eat with potato chips

A Day in History

But you'd have to be living in 1914.   That's  when the Titanics sank    Today - April 14, 1914 

Never loathe to make fun of something I Googled  "Titanc jokes" and several sites popped up.  A couple of them are offered here."Want to play Titanic?  Every time I say Titanic you go down on me."

Passenger asks the Captain, How close are we to land? "  "2 miles." "Which direction?"  "Down"

"

Where the pool is always filled."

Oh, boy

Yesterday's column was as badly ' written  as I've written in some time.  Let's see if I can do a better job today,

How did I know they were H'mooners?  The first thing they  orderedwas a bottle of champagne ad They told me and then, unhappy  Honeymooners in Booth #1 sent back their filet mignons. 

On receiving the perfectly good steaks Chef goes mad and sends me back with the steaks and a scathing lecture on the fine art of butchering  .  At the daughty Mermaid  filet mignon is served with a fine ruff of fat around the darling little steak which of course is what put them off their food so to speak.  

This was not airy lacy fat not by a long by a long shot but Chef adamantly defended his choice of cut. It adds more flavor He came out to apologize to the customers and with a split of (cheap you may be sure)champagne they were thrilled at having met the fabled Chef (only well known in various rehabs)

They paid the tab, gave me a nice fat tip  "for getting that scary chef  away from us " we all went to our various  homes.  

Chef  took a breather - several shots of rum  that would render the average drinker  prone - on a bad night he thought he was in Nicaragua where  Rum    is       - the water of Nic

Remembering with Laughter

Boots gave me my schedule and stations.  The whole lunch room   counter and in the main room 1st booth on the left.  Mrs. Boots had the all of the rest of them. Maybe she appreciated the proximity to the bar. GIVEN WHAT I'D SEEN I believed it.

The counter - lunch was never busy but it does remind as if I needed it how much I hated clean-up night when the catsup bottles were "married" which sounded a great deal more sexy than it was.  Whoever had the duty put one bottle neck - one on top of the other  then the counter tops got a scrubbing that in the future would foreshadow Covid 19 

One lovely summer day, I had a table of five; all males; One in a wheelchair.  Viet Nom I surmised. We  laughed and joked among ourselves.  A fun lunch and then the check came.  Out came the tab and while I'd never had any trouble with non-payers about it  I was a rookie. But none of that at that table! 

I was scanning it to make sure their adding was correct.  Not only wasn't it just fine but they each  had tipped me $20 cash  collectively $100. I reeled in schock as I looked at $100 cash monnney,  I'm would never do so before good sense too k over, I went running past Boots in his doorway screaming to the guys   "You paid too much! Wait! "That's 'way too much, holding out my money-filled palms."  The guys dusted a mist of sweat off of themselved , explained  that   

1TBA

Inside the (then) Mermaid

 Their proud management loved it that there were three doors in and out.  Few wanted to get in; many more wanted   out everyone except Boots and Mrs. Boots  she who drank Gin &Tonics her whole shift.  By quitte'n time she was fairly well toasted 

The first started at the  counter - scenic views of the kitchen and chef.  Next the only flicker of elegance in the whole place - the dining room with the bar, a horseshoed shaped structure with a bartender right out of Star Wars.  The bathrooms were all the way in the back of the building.

It wasn't until in a ramble around, wondering to see what  shift I'd be assigned  I "discovered" the formal dining room used for catered private parties. The outside catering saved them all from ptomain poisoning.

There real appeal for me was observation of these denizens of their version of  "work"  One slow evening, I got tutored about kitchen fires by the chef  rather vehemently I thought. The thrust of his instructions:  Never use water on a fire.  Use milk instead. with that and  brief finger shake, he slammed down his 4th or 5th shot of straight vodka  and turned back to a smoking hot skillet- you could tell -because sweat was pouring off of him. 

This has been an introduction to the place.  Now what were the people saying and doing?

She better emerge fast

Billed as the best dive bar in the  South   Bay and is locking up after a 70 year  gig.

It was also my first and last waitress  job.   Hired and fired.

Richie and I had recently been married d I was beginning to learn how to live beach side after having moving down here from Beverly Hills.  You can be poor there.  "90210"  I think. it was.  TV Serial

Now this new  residence  was in a 2-beroom in The Peppertree.  And so were we in one of them

On this midweek stroll down the Strand I passed a window  that roared:  HELP WANTED

The Mermaid  was that window.

There weren't any customers at 2 p.m. only a man sitting on a stool   in the doorway  to the parking lot. with a beer in one hand and a cheap cigar in the other*  He introduced himself  " Boots  "and asked me to return the next day for an interview.

I was happy to agree.  How did I know it was cheap?  The smell, my friends

Richie was home and listened intently as I related my story .

Sidebar:  Richie didn't care if I worked or not., he  warned me  RIGHT AFTER THE VOWS.all I want when I get home is for you to be in a good mood."     Read, file that on e.and of all things ACT NICE 

.e

What to wear to this all-important interview with this Boots character.  I looked at my opened closet door. and mulled the contents.  

If I'd known my work clothes would consist of  white jeans and a white tee-shirt and a yellow  carpenters nailing apron ...

Hmmm

Food for thought without any calories -  Change is inevitable  except f0r a vending machine 

And The Mermaid comes Out of the Pacific

 Presumably combing her long blonde hair.  Adventure Awaits

Damned Computer

 Wrestling with it all afternoon

fitty cent vs uh dollah

 Today, April 2 was one of the several-times a year -Friend of the Redondo Beach Main Library. Book S

We never miss one.  Why?   The prices!  Paperbacks 50 cents   Hardbacks $1

Everything  else is separately marked.  The savings are incredible. 

50 cents

Lee Child  Killing Floor  (1 of his first) and  Burning Echo

John   Grisham The Testament and  Gray Mountain

Jeffrey Deaver  The Coffin Dancer

Janet Evanovitch  Hard Eight

P.J. O'Rourk e

all the Trouble In the World

Though a soft cover I think it's  $1

$8. total bill  and these are not skinny little pamphlets  easily 500 pages per book

echo

Greg Iles Dead Sleep

When Movie Sets Are Dangererous to Actors

Actors  like John Wilkes Booth who was the actor who was the man - and actor - who shot Abe Lincoln.  He fled, toward Virginia, arriving at a tobacco barn where he died at 2.am. on April 26 1865.  He was 26.

More recently actor Brandon Lee,28 was shot to death accidentally during the filming of a movie in Wilmington NC

  April 1st 22 was his birthday

Willie Nelson's - slightly altered.  "Mammas, don't let your babies grow up to be cowboys'.)be actors (original was 'cowboys.')

 

Hah! Gotcha!

April 1 aka April Fools.

Only one I can remember show's it's antiquity.  you'll need a spool of thread for the needle  . because you' are  going to take the threaded needle and, choosing a very visible spot, run a threaded with your trusty needle leaving a long "tail"  dangling  smack in your face.    Other theThe humor:  

The person who made this discovery  will tug on the thread tail.  

and it will keep right on unspooling  The thread will keep unloading.  The face on the puller will reflect the distaste of the thread-puller.

Huh? you say?  This was back in high school - mine not yours.  Google

Visit and Query Funniest  April Fools Day jokes; there're a lot of them  After all who knew what needles and thread were for other than decorative  "Oh my aunt made the most beatiful counted cross stitch for me for my birthday,  She joked that it took a year to make it ,"she said of the finished product "It's for two birthdays!"

Enjoy your April 1st - laugh your butt off!

Little Did We Know

Liberals are  going around blaming  Trump for the slap heard round the world 

Today's Headline, courtesy Dail Breeze

This greeted us from our driveway:

OSCARS Develop Case of Stage  Fight 

Cool, no?

OSCARS! STARTING AT 5 P.M.

(Reaction)  YAWN biggr amd deeper than the Grand Canyon 

Is Putin Gay?

 I read in an extrememly  trashy tabloid that he was,  article was illustrated by an erver so gentile picture of two men having tea - dainty little cups and all.

Putin - Ow you dawg!

Four year courtship;  Ludmilla didn't think he was proposing but about to dump her.  "He looked happy when I said, 'Yes'

They married and had two daughters.  Don't know if it was marital boredom; fatigue at having to hide but a divorce  put paid to divorce.  

Putins' next trip down lovers lane involved taking up with a gymnast who was a flight attendant for Aeroflot or as it is known  to those in the airline business:  Aeroflop  

More to come.  

Due to Putin's obsession with discretion  any research I've  somehow dug out was hard

Quick and Dirty or Easy as Lying

World's Fastest Mac

1 box of  Velveeta 1 bag of macaroni   Cook macaroni Drain and add Velveeta  Mix well  Serve

Salt and pepper pasta

Cook amount of favorite pasta, drain.  Either add proper jar sauce OR (my favorite - toss with olive oil and several grinds of rainbow pepper and salt)

A Site To See  - fruit gone bad  Did you know that you can tell a woman's mood from her hands ?At a glance?   Yes -- if she's carrying a gun go elsewhere as fast as you can

The Day Caught Up and Over Me

Yeah you've never had that, 

I wanted to tell you  some time  saving meals.  But you can save some   right now - quit reading this!

W'e will see you tomorrow

Today's Treat - Getting our taxes done

Well you may wonder at the mind that thinks this is a 'treat'  I do though because I deliberately book a time that coincides with lunch.  The treat is Factor's Famous Deli Pico, Beverly Hills, and their corned beef sandwiches.  We no longer have a deli at the beach- not enough Jews I guess.  So this is really a treat as we're too lazy to make a trip that far north.  

The Dancing Priest

To be more accurate, the stripping priest; no dancing  at the celebration of  life - one of his fellow ramp mangers at AA.  It was held at a VFW lodge.  He peeled off his robes at the end of the celebration leaving a somewhat gobsmacked audience.  Ah, some tradition has lasted though - he was an Irish priest.

$43.00 for a Piece of Heaven

Thursday we met our dear friend Dee on the patio of the Hermosa Saloon (Mouton was playing golf.  He's always playing golf.  Yeah, hooked.)   We had Monika with us though.  Richie nicknamed her "The Polish Tornado for the speed at which she punches through life.

The four of us chose to sit at a bench and table in full sunshine out in a spacious patio and proceeded to 3 beers and one lemonade.  Dee is also of Polish descent and he and Monika enjoyed discovering   the similarities.  Grandmothers figured bigly in their tales.

The Hermosa Salon  211 PCH, Hermosa   Fairly reasonable/y priced - sample:3 Stellas $32

1 Pacifico $7.50  For  a grand total of $43.25 - place to have a cold one?  FREE !

Monica doesn't drink so ordered a lemonade.  This is becoming "a thing"  Her drink was free.

Revenge of the Yachless

Source: Drudge Report - an oligarch's yacht is being held  not for ransom as we know it but never the less stuck  in a Norwegian port.  The captain refuses to buy gas there.

Sounds Like Something My Dad Would Do

Two pilots are planning to sky dive into each other's planes IN FLIGHT.  Or so they are planning.

One is sponsored by Red Bull; the other by Hulu.  Damned waste of two good airplanes my Dad would say.  He should know,  in the late 20's ;early '30s he and his thrill seeking bestie and him flew in an  air  circus.  That is, my Dad flew in it until another circus member had to cancel a performance .  Daddyy nailed the wing walker but came a cropper (literally) when his parachute failedAnd didn't open for 1,200 ftt landing at 50 ft in a forlorn frield of dried-up corn stalks.

Source  Drudge Report  Pilots to Swap Planes in Air

O Gawd

The 5 most dreaded words in the English language - I've got the dentist today.  

Silver lining:  She numbs my gums

This just in from the Num-ber  Club ( for dental work only)  Its the same old gel contents but this time  same gel has been forced into an aerolspray can it is then sprayed all along the tooth line.  Absolutely no   pain and lasts just as long as needed.  I dozed all of the time she was working.

- 

Idle Thoughts

 Watching the TV News last night I was surprized at the numbers of little kids walking along  with stuffed animals.  And though the toys weren't heavy - like lugging an entire  train set they would  eventually get there  so in an effort  to be kind  don't buy  stuffed  animals for their parents .  It's a dubious kindnes;

Time Change is no ones friend.  Remember an old song?  "Does anyone know what time it is?"

So when you see an ad soliciting Support Ukraine, send cash - doesn't weigh any thing and goes everywhere

Family History -

Always another side of the story - so!  My sister wrote about Ukraine and Kansas but this is my version:  once upon a time:  there was a small village "owned by the tsar."  He decided to raise the rent the villaged sat on.  They were incensed.  To say the least.  About then they began hearing about a wonderful  place called "Kansas."  The adults voted and decided to send they village elders to this wonderfulness if only for the gift of 640 acres to each family FREE.  And  checked and the land was rich and  productive; perfect for growing red wheat, their specialty hence the ensuing nickname Breadbasket of America?)

Anyway the entire village moved in toto to Kansas.  What no one told the villagers was that it was winter time and what with one thing or another the villagers hadn't had time to build houses and they had to live that first winter in the  boxcars that they rode into their area in Kansas,

And with the arriving villagers came John and Anna, a pair of 12 year old orphans  -whom would become my mother's parents.  As a result, I'm only 2nd generation.

An Interesting juxtaposition of Ukraine and the great State of Kansas!

 My younger sister loves poking - or  jabbing - the family tree

Meant to be - The Sunflower is the official  flower of both.  I don't  think )of sunflowers and a slavic country somehow.   

Today it's  interesting because it links our  mother's her family  to Ukraine    particularly  the ones who came to Kansas (others went to Soth Dakota and Pennsylvania..)  My younger sister wrote the following:

I HAVEANCESTRAL TIE TO UKRAINE

The recent posts by Kansas friends regarding Ukraine as the "bread basket of Europ3with the same state flower  prompted  me to look into my Mennonite great grandparents.  today's were under Russian rule.

But come 1870 unacceptable changes were coming so a delegation of 12 of the 45,000 in South Russia.10,000 departed for South Dakota and some settled in Penn.  The country of Ukraine has a fascinating history.  Recommended reading

Who Let the Sheep out?

W're having huge, strong winds today.   Richie looked this up and found and found it's traveling at 28 mph  WxW.   It feels like a hella lot of noise for "only" 28mph.  Well idle speculation is of no particular value here,

Now to tackle this sheep thing.  It's rather obscure if you don't speak French .  Because of this lurid wind, we decided to go to our favorite Pacific viewing spot  certain that said ocean would be in an uproar.  we took a ride down the shore.  And our lovely navy blue ocean was awash in white foam..  To be blunt I immediately got it about the French's they looked like sheep butts.  A mature sheep is a Mouton not only in French but on  many a menu.

Once upon a time our neighbors across a stairwell at The Peppertree apartments lived in peace and happiness.  - us newly married, Dee Air Force Acadamy graduate  and  punch line Rich Mouton all lived happily together.  Dining in one or nor another's home they were and air Dodger 

In the ensuing years Mouts  my nickname for him for Mouton got married a couple of times; more recently Dee has overcome The Virus and no longer is tethered to a rolling oxygen tank after 26 days in ICU.

A happy event. And all of us are healthy and happy.  The only semi-bad thing is that the wind is so strong you can't hear the sheep bellowing.  I think they bellow but damned if I know.

The Name's the Same But It's a Different Menu

Tin Roof Bistro, Manhattan Beach

I love their Fig and Pig pizza - chunk bacon and cooked figs.  Richie, born in Brooklyn thinks this is a barbarous combination and desecrates "real" pizza  He had their enormous hamburger named after the starter of the place and sneered at me the whole time. 

Reassurance for Tin Roof Bistro junkies.  Tin Roof Bistro Maui! Front Street. 

Different Menu you may be sure

Kimchi 

Dashi broth  

Both ring the cash register at $2  Believe me there are no $2 items in the Manhattan Beach branch!

But Maui does have something we don't  Fleetwood Mac's place which is more Hawaiian than the place itself.  Lobster and shrimp roll with jalapena sauce$18

Beer-steamed mussels$24

Crab and Corn fritters $13

Opened by Fleetwod his very own self on 8/23/2012  

And how do I know the above?  My younger sister and my bro-in-law are on Maui as I type.

The Fine Art of the Oblique Insult

My good side ( I do too, have one) says not to espouse it but this is at least some what intellectual.

In the '8s a Prime Minister remarked about the time that a bunch of New Zealanders moved to Australia, "Raising the IQ of both places," he said .Probably said by all.

Such a waste you're a  lesbian.

To someone holding a home made item, "Who helped you?" Nod to holder.

"I was complimented fpr looking so good in my 40s.  I was 35.

Trophy presentation "You tried."

Dad to me:  "You're the son I never had."  Self, "Thanks, Dad."

"I hope your day is as nice as you are."

Error 401

Whatever that may mean.  I think the error this time - "State of the Union" is in the title of a Presidential address.

It's prime time tonight with Bident's speech on just that.  A few samples.  

dismal

sad

this one is at least   brief:  fucked!  or more politely  SNAFU

Lady Bird Kept Her Silence

Disapointing (sigh)

I found this worthy of mention - the Ark was built by amateurs but professionals built the Titanic

 

A Voice In The Night But Not Richie or me

 Not last night, but the night before ...I was woken by a soft but articulate voice saying, "Take care; Grim Reaper Grim Reaper."  It was our cockatiel Lady Bird with her dulcet little voice!

I was hoping she'd do it again with another of her sayings last night but apparently she wasn't in the mood for a concert. Grim Reaper in the middle of the night is disturbing on some level...

When in the mood to use her soft voice she also says:

Drink your beer!

Be a bird!

Take care!

Grim Reaper !

Which use of her linguistic skills is rather disconcerting! 

But her "voice" is soft and lulling and I drifted back to sleep.  Richie was sorry he'd missed it but not enough to berate me for not waking him up.  Himself likes a good rest.

To avoid confusion - an explanation - her name Lady Bird has nothing to do with the late Mrs. Johnson and her equally dead husband Lyndon.

Rest up today Lady Bird - your fans await you.

I started out writing largely about restaurants.  In the passing years the focus began to change its  place   "Incidents in life,"   would now describe it better.

Shrimp boats are a'comin'; their sails are in sight...Shrimp boats are a'comin there's dancing tonight a hit for Jo Stafford in 1951

Here followsa list of local places who have mastered shrimp dishes.  In no particular order:

Charlie's,( a New York joint ) .  I go there for their Shrimp Scampi which is a combo of six big fat shrimp in a generous olive oil bath which is delightfully garlicky.  They bill it as an appetizer but it's heaven to me.  Sadly they're renovating and will be otherwise engaged in that project.  But when you do go - Caesar salad and (personal favorite) 10 in. light crust pizza with pineapple and pepperoni.

If you want to return to the '50s Old Tony's on the Pier has on offer batter-fried shrimp with the obligatory tartar sauce side and the usual red cocktail sauce.   

Bonus: views   rows of condos lining the shore, couples strolling along the beach and last not least, the open ocean below where you are sitting.  Old Tony's is more about the ambience than the food.  My always  order is the battered fried  shrimp .  Be sure to get the house salad or you could have clam chowder    Rock n'roll is here to stay!

Phuket Thai -Poo Kett  I was told ph is p in Thailand.  But of course the natural thought is quite different from that.  For all I know it's the same in Thai or in English. We haven't been in a long time but I'd go back tonight for the five or six shrimp dishes on their menu.  There's one you can make at home.  Buy a jar or Trader Joe's Yellow Curry Sauce, cook a bunch of shrimp and dump in the yellow curry.  We did go there often enough for me to remember the curry is #68 on the menu.

Maderos Cuisine Mexican for cheese-stuffed, bacon -wrapped shrimp.  They do a version of this classic with a great wedge of lemon squeezed over each shrimp.  A zesty surprise for the tongue.

Maderno's  424 350 7031

Phuket Thai - 310-374 9598

Las Brisas 310 376-6884

Old Tony's on the Pier  310 374

Say It On A T-Shirt

 Mom didn't raise any dummies and if she did, it was my brother.

I thought growing old would take longer.

Sometimes I pretend to be normal, but that gets boring so I go back to me.

Fun-cle - similar to Dad but 'way cooler

Don't be a Richard; you're already a Dick

Potatoes make fries, chips and vodka - it's like other vegetables aren't even trying

Warning - those of us who are in their 60s have no business wearing printed t-shirts

COMMENT:  Richie's cousin wrote to say that her daughter, who lives in Northern Calif. has a closet with easily 100 funny t-shirts - and she's 50 years old! 

2/22/2022 Two major events occurred

  Historical:  1630.  Yeah we pretty much missed it excepting for the possiblity that my old  history teacher might have actually been there.  I meant it when I said old.  )  

So what did we miss?

 Massachusetts Bay Colony residents were the gleeful recipients of popcorn!  Their donor was a  "Native American" which phrase didn't even exist back then.  His name lived on and it was: Quad equina  Given I took Latin in Highschool, Many moons ago.  This might translate as four horses. highschool wKeep  it in mind as long ago and far away for me..I bet the Bay Colony collectively  totally lost it if old Quadequin to a popped it then and there.  Indians couldne't get a licence to carry  but they didn't have guns anyhow

  NEED TO PROOF yhis AND COVER THE OTHER EVENT BUT HAVE APPT TO BUY NEW GLASSES

Didn't need new glasses - go, titanum frames!

Tonight we have the inestimable of joining Mouton and Dee whose birthday it is at the Charterhouse.  Study the menu - some new stuff as well well as old favorites

Bye, bye Grannie - Your flight is loaded and ready to go.

You'll be up in the wild blue yonder before you know it.  Or maybe you're already there?

Yes, we followed your instructions and booked American.  You never DID fly any other line.

Yes, I know - American or nothing.

Yes, I'm sure, I watched them, uh, "board" you.  You don't remember?  Not surprising - you did die of Alzheimer's disease.  

My source is a retired crew member of the baggage bunch and  he has loaded more than several

But you wanted to know how staff at American receive the plain cardboard? box and where they put it. The box is loaded head first "Because that's how you'd be if not dead.  Dead is a great deal more expensive than a live passenger $10,000 to $20,000  and you don' even get a get a window seat.  Start a Funeral Fund tomorrow - ya think?  

If your flight attendant, addresses you by saying Tom Cruise,?  he/she was asking you if you wanted Tea or Coffee.  Little Sidebar here

First You Kill the Lobster

How to kill a lobster - using a dagger-like knife, stab straight into its head.  To make sure it's dead, then toss it into boiling water.

My source - The Irish Cook Book $34.79;   480 recipes  Published Feb. 26, 2020  "Consider it a course on Irish cuisine.  There are 5 lobster recipes but that's not all!

Scallops in brown butter as well as mussels,  sea urchins.   Cockles and bread crumbs  

Crab with curry and pineapple   Charred  Octopus with  a seaweed glaze

Potted Shrimp which is basically cook, the shrimp blender it and packed in Irish butter becoming a cocktail dip for toast points to scoop.  The spices used are vinegar and dill.

I was amazed to find venison  dishes are often on menus.  Where do the Irish hide them?  The Aran Islands?  What we ate during a tour in 2006

Full English breakfast of a pair of strips of bacon, fried tomatoes, black pudding, buttered toast, eggs sunny-side up.  All of this was served buffet style.  Pub Lunch - plowman's lunch - big chunk 'o cheese inside a couple of slices of bread with a big slice of sour pickle.  Dinner one night was shrimp in rosemary sauce - very similar to tartar sauce.  I got the impression that the cook (not chef level) ground up a bunch of fresh rosemary and mayonnaise. 

An Irish drink - "Dublin Lawyer"

1/4 cup Jameson's Irish whisky    4 cups of heavy cream    white pepper to taste and one dead lobster

This can double down as Dublin Lawyer ice cream. when frozen 

If, after reading this you may be wondering "ta f--k???'  Cockle?  If you just want to see one pay Cap'n Kidd a visit and ask about any exotics.  His fish market's goods are delicious - the shrimp cocktail is 4 great big shrimp, sauce on the side for $6.  Harbor view from the outdoor tables.  Cap'n Kidd's is located at the north end of the Redondo Beach Pier.  Hidden from the street behind the condos.

The irish Cook Book

I was aghast!  The Irish were once known for NOT being  able to cook so this big fat book should be of great help. 

They have an ingredient that doesn't  com easily to an American kitchen - lobster.  I think the first 5 or 6 recipes call for it.  Give me the chance to delve into them and then give samples to you.  We may not able to use lobster, but we can dream, can/t we?

Things We Think Silly - Until We Need Them

Visiting my sister in Libertyville, IL some 20 miles North of Chicago I went out to the garage for a cigarette - At -5 it was 'way out of my comfort zone.  But, what is this?  The garage wasn't freezing, but with a thick sweat shirt on it was actually quite comfortable.  In fact, compared to outdoors it was quite cozy!

When I teased her about being so rich they heat their garage, she sister said (sardonically) have you seen the weather headlines?  Would you want to try to start your car in a drafty uninsulated garage?  At - 5?  They  have to heat their garages.

Southern California doesn't have COLD that bad.  If we ever do, the prices to heat your garage range from:

$80.74  to  $1,196.46*

Go 'head on - you're rich!

A REPORT

Anderson IN Doug weighs in with this from a garage heater guy. " The garage heater is a ceiling furnace.  It's 220 volt and is running about twice an hour in this weather.  The electricity bill runs $22 - $25 per month.  It's necessary because the well tank and water heater would freeze." 

Humph.

Hellfire and damnation re yesterday's football game. 

At Home With the Super Bowl

Not having anything like $75,000 to buy a ticket for the Stupid Bowl - 75 cents being do-able am looking forward to relaxing in my own home (where the snacks and beer are and they're free, too)) watching what is all too often lamentable football 

A doctor recommends - take a water break when the players do - hydration is very important

Gulp the water and sip the beer.

Take a break from the snacks and walk around the living or house every quarter.  Helps digest the snacks.

I would counsel that you think of New Year's Eve and Super Bowl as equally lethal.  Stay off of the roads.  Especially in states that lost.  Distracted drivers mentally  replaying where it all went sidewise are just as dangerous as the drunk one lane over throwing beer cans at you.

Home safe.

No Blog Because No News for It

It's all Super Bowl, all of the time.

Anyhow, may your team win and you get the money without being mugged on the way home.   

                                                         GO BENGALS

Calling Bullshit

It seems unlikely - at 9:22 a.m., it's 66 degrees - and supposed to climb to 73 by 10 a.m.  This seems unlikely to say the least.  It wouldn't surprise me if parkers didn't make reservations for the next year.

Amusing - both the LA Times and Daily Breeze have feature articles on the parking situation near the stadium.  Driveway owners are whining that they can't park in their own driveways.  Have you never seen front yard signs offering Parking:  $50!  ?  I have.    

Super Bowl Tidbits

This is not a finished job because I have One More Thing to find out- who the hell paid $75,000 for a ticket to this ?  Previously highest price was $70,000.  The average cheap seats rose from $4650 to $5335.

We see this  upping the ante in the parking lot - the previous cost rise from $4650 to $5,335

But your ticket is good for the half-time show featuring Dr Dre, Snoop Dogg Eminem, Mary J. Blidge and Kendrick LaMar   None of whom have I ever seen.

Food?  None I could find as I trolled around, looking.  I don't need to find concession prices; I already know they'll be nose-bleeding expensive.  The 2010 event - beer was $25 a pop, ruinous for alcoholics - bring the pink slip to your car, guys. The #1 food is order-in sausage pizza  which is said to be the #3 most popular flavor.  Sausage?  I wouldn't eat that for love nor money.  Sausage is mainly a collection of gristle, fat and salt to me.  

Back to the $75,000 ticket.  If it was a corporate buy,  used mainly for entertaining possible future clients  and is a tax write-off it makes sense.

If it's some rich asshole showing off, flashing the box keys at some steel-bellied airhead and saying to her, "It's so loud here!  But, wait!  I know a great place!, grasping her moist little hand and tugging her gently off to his lair of mischief. 

TBC - if you find the $75,000 ticket buyer, contact me instantly - I have a couple of SINGLE friends.  One good turn deserves another - if all goes well, my butt will be in a $75,000 seat.

Would you eat peanut butter bacon- flavored ice cream?

 Taking a wild stab here -probably not  But your dog will!

You read that right - doggie ice cream!  Richie's niece got one for Duke or was it Dolly's birthday?

They had a variety of choices - prices range from $3.49 at Dogstar

Or Ben and Jerry's for $12.99 per pint, (PetCo)each which could backfire on you if some prankster puts one in with the human pints.  Be safe - make your own Nice Ice - take a couple of bananas and put them in a blender and freeze them.  I suggest mashing the finished product into an ice cube tray for a more or less portion-controlled serving.

Never give a pet chocolate and if your pet gets into the Valentine leftover candy get it to your vet on an emergency basis - it is.

Sidebar - Pantyhose stretched over your mask are said by experts (I couldn't find one)to be far more efficient in virus defense than any other - unless you're a sex pervert.  You do run the risk of arrest if spotted.  Or the luck of a good alibi.

Back Monday.

 

a Day In The Lifeof a rehabilation patien tPlus Sick Slow Computer

F11 a.m.  

wAs upi can see - computer problemsit for riday 2/4/22: 9 a.m. Home Caregiver arrives to dosekeeping - brooming, mopping, LAUNDRY

Damn! Snow Is Expensive

I have a cousin who has lived most of his life in Anderson, IN. He e'd us that there will be will be 3 to 5 in. of wet snow. He had been nattering on about snowblowers (passive) and I wrote back that  it was a job for a plow.

He replied that he'd just hired a guy for $3500and he added that he was really happy. I wrote back and asked if he hadn't meant $350? Back he wrote it's  $35 - case of a misplaced comma.

Film at 11

Back In February, 2018, with the Reader's Digest

 Ant:   a small insect that, though always at work, still finds time to go to picnics.

Turkeysare peacocks that have let themselves go.

Giraffe's were in invented  in 1780 when three horses accidentally ate a ladder.

Barbecue Shrimp - It Came to New Orleans from Chicago

A New Orleans businessman came back from a trip there and when he began raving about a shrimp dish he'd encountered, the people of NOLA (New Orleans Louisiana) had to try it.  To avoid any association with a damn Yankee thing, they made haste to call it New Orleans Barbecue Shrimp despite the fact the shrimp never came near a bbq pit.  

Having heard about it, we had to try it and fell in love.  Not one to be a hog, here's the ingredients and how tos:

New Orleans BBQ Shrimp

2 lbs large shrimp in their shells

1 cup of butter

juice of 2 lemons - 2 teasp - minced garlic

2TWorcestershire sauce 2T black pepper

Wash and clean the shrimp and lay them out on a large baking sheet.  Heat everything else and drizzle over shrimp, adding the squeezed lemon quarters as garnish adding the black pepper.  Bake at 375 for 15 - 20 minutes.

Pascale's Manale is the restaurant, and is well known and since it's delicious, no wonder they're still packing in the cash customers.  Ask them to use shucked shrimp or you'll spend your dinner time peeling - and need I say it? wolf it down

Getting back to my roots - and vegetables, fruits, and restaurants

 Originally this column was my bid at fame and perhaps fortune (Sell ads in the blog for a royalty)  It began as restaurant reviews, hence the title Word of Mouth - cute, eh?  Occasionally a recipe so you could make dishes like Maderna's cheese-stuffed, bacon wrapped shrimp at home.

I haven't done any recipes for awhile - The Virus kept us all at home, and the restaurants, source OF any recipes were closed.

And then house cleaning turned up The Little New Orleans Cookbook by native Gwen McKee.  Which in turn had a great variety of good eats.  Let's.

The only local Cajun/Creole place around is The Ragin Cajun.  One of my favorite things of theirs is corn and crab bisque.

CORN AND CRAB BISQUE  

1/2 lb. butter

3T flour

1 large onion, chopped - more toward minced than chunked

1 quart milk 

1 16 oz can of creamed corn

1 can Cream of Potato soup*  Doubling for Mornais sauce?

1/4teas mace (I think the mace adds that  faintly smoky taste)

pinch of red pepper

1 pint picked over crab meat

1/4 lb. grated Swiss cheese (say "huh"?) 

Melt the butter, sifting in the flour, then the onions  to be soft-cooked for about 10 minutes to get them that way.  When this has all died down, add the milk a little at a time.  The author left this step out, but it makes sense.  

*Bisque could be described as white gravy - Mornais sauce - with a bunch of crab in it.  Picked over crab, of course. 

Strangers In Our House - Welcome!

When I was finally discharged from - either the hospital or physical rehab, Richie was ready to become my sole caretaker but he wanted help.  In various phone calls he discovered an outfit call Synergy, Manhattan Beach.  Their CEO and Office Manager made an appt. and we all met deciding that we would hire their services - light housekeeping - dusting, cleaning, even cooking (!)

We've had a wonderful chance to meet some equally lovely people.  A small sample...Cheyenne  who is a flourishing hip hop artist .  She routinely travels to her shows with four bodyguards, a road manager and any friends who want to come and were able to get babysitters.  When she leaves us at 4 p.m.she goes to the studio, waves her magic cloak and becomes Queenye who is a hip hop performer, artist and who also (if that's not enough) this Saturday night she opens for another artiste named DW Flame at the Honda Center in Santa Ana, 8:30 p.m.

To meet her simply Google  "Queenye" She has an excellent manager because there are tons of videos, songs - and one in an auditorium has a whole bunch of sparkling lights in the audience. 

M is from Poland and I like to joke to myself "Polish who loves to Polish"  M made pirogi and brought it over for us - It was delicious; we loved it.

C is the office manager - great guy - if a worker is unavailable, he fills in without hesitation.  Did a beautiful job on a cabinet, here in the living room.

Richie likes them one and all as do I.  If you need any of the above services, we recommend Synergy.

But This Is Not Racism or Discrimination (shrug) So what the Hell Is It?

 Supreme Court Steven Breyer has announced his retirement from the Court, opening the door to Biden to try to put in a black woman and only a black woman  as his replacement.  

Only black female jurists need apply-- but this is not racism or discrimination.    

When did the world turn sidewise? and how did I miss it?  

Other thing I missed was:  put in the most qualified in the field being filled.  But some idiot would undoubtedly come along and proclaim taking the best candidate  for the job is racist or discriminatory or both.  Win for losing comes dancing into my mind...

My God! Don't Eat That!

 A recent headline in drudgereport.com outlined a quick story on a French cannibal, jailed for killing and eating the tongue and brain of a farmer with a tasty side of white beans.  Flagolais I think they're called.  He was apprehended trying to attack a woman who was walking her dog while in an area of the Pyreneese where Rimbaud was considered the king of cannibal killers.  I wondered if the dog was dessert.

Rimbaud, a 34 year old Afghanistan veteran went right smack back to prison.

In another illustration of cannibalism Disney's new movie "Fresh" illustrates cannibalism, carrying over, evidently , from the days of it's popularity and that would be in the 1500 and 1600 when it flourished all over Europe.

Meanwhile animals can be cannibals - infanticide - among their 1,500 species and people have been known to dine from bits and pieces of themselves!  They are called auto cannibals.

Who is credited with most cannibalism performed?  Jeffrey Dahmer who dined from 1978 to 1991.  He had a specific prey - boys and young men.  17 of them to be accurate.  

What did the poor parents have to bury?  Dahmer's feces?

Goodbye Freedom

The minute you step through the doorway of "your" room you've lost all calls on freedom.  I say your in quotes because all three of the rooms I occupied - you can't call it "living" - had three patients per room.  Not a lot of privacy - if any - to be had.

Remember that you are at their mercy.  They can withhold food, pain medication or, God forbid, a dry diaper and all sense of privacy.  It is normal for a member of the opposite sex to "bathe" the other.

Said "baths" consist of one of the roughest all over scrub downs you will ever encounter.  They apply a lot of pressure in sensitive areas (read: genitals)  And intrusive.  I was reminded of a sex practice of gay males called "fisting" and called them out on it to no appreciable positive affect.

Nursing staff revels in fright - the nurses flip you around on the sheet you are lying on (Kevlar?) and as for privacy normal routine is to approach a patient and the nurse will then bellow, "Dry pants?"  and the hapless patient can only respond, not dive under the bed.  

You can't escape by cutting and running since the beds all have alarms that go off if you so much as remove a toe from said bed.  Your bed is resting on scales and the slightest removal of weight sets off horrendous noises.  

Speaking of noises, my corridor and closer still, my room also held an elderly woman who spent most of a night moaning most plaintively, "Hep me!  Nurse!" over and over and over.  That corridor was quite willing to "hep" her.  Right into a hearse!  If a bed can be wired to an alarm ...

One Thing Leads to Another - Hence This:

 It is my contention that "nursing homes" deliberately condition patients to become incontinent (bed wetters) as a matter of course......  

How they do it? The  home while the patient is a little out of it, slips them into an adult diaper.  Thus when the addled, but dry patient rings the buzzer for a trip to the bathroom with the nurse, said functionary can return with this pithy (deliberate) instruction - "Oh, just go in your pants."

When you have demand, you will also find money which roused a vivid mental picture of Mafia vs. Corporate Greed over expensive lunches in exotic venues - Aruba is said to be a popular "Get to know you," place.  

"But that's expensive!" you cry.  Back comes the retort:  "Nursing homes' population is 75 per cent incontinent," and even wholesale, sell as follows - sample  

Women - 30 count package $15.78   Male - 32 count $16.99

The Mafia rep - DiDi Di Fontanina and the CEO - a Cabot Lodge I seem to remember - stretch in the Aruban sun.  Cocktails and dinner with a planned stop for an undie change.  Their saying is "If you're pushing a product, you use it,"  DiDi said only recently.  It was on the flight to Paris.  One of their designers was having an engineering problem on the mens' scrotum pouch sample. His models don't understand his French and there have been some heated discussions during the fitting sessions.  

But no one is incontinent.

Rehab? RUN! Scam

All live-in rehabs are scams.  Personal experience:  1 hour (if that) rehab done a day and then you spend the next 23 hours and eat 3 meals a day.  Much better to stay home and go to them on an appt. basis.  There is absolutely no reason to move in there for an hour of "stand up; sit down"  "pull the giant rubber band between your hands." 

Especially if during the night, as you froth and rage in your three bed "suite" you are subject to The Howler which is a woman (usually") screaming in desperation, "Nurse!'  "Somebody help me!"

Marie Antoinette on the Platform issuing last pleas for clemency. .

Up and down the hall her misery it went while she lay fluffed up in her warm soft bed.  (I will give them that - a comfortable bed.  I finally drifted off - is THAT why it was named Driftingawaywood?  All of us were ready to drive the hearse that would take her elsewhere. 

 And soon!

Someone says "Rehab"? RUN

 I spent nearly 6 months in various of the above.  Safely home where they don't want to take my blood pressure every time I blink, I hope to give any remaining readers here a tour - what I saw, thoughts and sheer horror - 

First on the program is an outpost named Driftwood which wags like us immediately changed to Drif ting away wood a real bitch to type.  The place is ghastly, too.  More of which in the future.