Tuesday, June 30, 2020

Social Life During the Time of the Virus

Mild as it is, nevertheless, there can be one.  I give you an example.

The South Bay Writers Workshop (aka Thursday Writers) is about to celebrate our annual Summer Solstice Celebration.  This ceremony began as a Pot Luck Picnic and was quite popular among us.

And then gradually, we all got lazy and began patronizing various restaurants en masse.  Our demands are really very simple - ample free parking.  Bonus if it's the restaurant's own parking lot.   Patio seating.  Wine and beer at least.  Food?  Oh, yeah, they have to serve some.

We are a democracy and put together a list of suggestions and then vote on them.  Majority rules and that's where we go.

This year, the virus demands a patio to stay in God's fresh air.  Especially as we'll be beachside.  The parking lot is to avoid interrupting one's meal to stick more money into a meter.  As beneficial as fresh sea breezes are, they can cool your food off in the length of time it takes to get to your vehicle.

One of our favorite places is Rock'n Brew, Redondo Beach, and have had at least three Solstices and a couple of Christmas lunches there over the years.  Alas right now, they don't open until 3 p.m. which is a bit tardy for this group.  We're not in our 30s any longer and we thus didn't roll out of bed at 12 noon.

As it happens, I've never eaten at this summer's choice so will review it for you on Friday.

Monday, June 29, 2020

Ha Ha Rabid Racists

One of the newer fads in this current race to rewrite history is the proposed re-naming of John Wayne International Airport.  Strip away the Duke!  Re-name it!

Proposed new name:  Orange County Airport.  News flash - it's been commonly referred to as that for quite a few years.

Saturday, June 27, 2020

Been Self-Quarantined a Little Too Long?

This is, or purports to be, a true story.  It happened in Dear Old Blighty aka Great Britain.  

Radio announcer for KISS FM-UK Sam Darlaston got home from Tesco with a head of his favorite  vegetable - broccoli - and discovered it had worms!  The order of the following events wasn't spelled out but he got a refund from Tesco ($1.57) and decided to raise the larva/worms whatever to full-fledged butterflies!  White cabbage I believe they were.  

He became fascinated by these events and named his favorite worm? Larva "Cedric" and promptly put this story on his broadcast.  Like the virus itself, it swept through his listeners imaginations and they were happy.  

And great peace and contentment were theirs.  And all who listened were pleased.  And Cedric flew the fuck away and has never been seen again.  But the people are happy.  

Friday, June 26, 2020

Ah, the 50 States

Boredpanda.com is worth a look today.  No they don't pay me for all of the mentions here, but certainly a modest check wouldn't be amiss...

Languages - In California and Nevada, the most popular language after English and Spanish is:  Tagalog.  in Texas and Oklahoma, it's Vietnamese; Florida is French Creole, but you'd think that would be reserved for Louisiana.

Texas, Florida and Illinois are all smaller that LA County.

This has got to be the oddest category of some fascinating ones - a map of all of the towns named Springfield - and the easiest routes to take to cover them all!

Feuds - Texas hates Oklahoma; California hates Texas  Subcategory not covered here - the loudest or most quiet states.  They hiss or yell insults, I guess, based on where they live.

The most common birth countries for foreigners here (legally or not was not mentioned.)  Not counting Mexico, of course.

California and Nevada? the Philippines Texas - India!

Lesser but not less interesting - states by numbers of drug overdoses.  Or out-of-service railroads!

A map of the US with most popular coffee chains.  Not surprisingly Starbucks blankets all of this map with the except on the East Coast being Dunkin.

Relish air traffic control zones; who wants to more to another state?  The number of Waffle Houses - none on the West Coast.

And, you realize I can't make this stuff up.  Just thought it was timely to add that as the very last item is:  The eye color of every governor in the United States.  Brown predominates.    

Thursday, June 25, 2020

Master of Irony II

A worthy successor to the original Master of Irony, O'Henry, Frederick Forsyth is his worthy successor.

And who might old FF be?  The author of a couple of familiar tales - "The Day of the Jackal" 1971, and "The Odessa File" in 1972.

Forsyth is now 81 and in 2016 said "I am giving up thrillers because my wife me that I am too old to travel to dangerous places."

After two years in Biafra, a lingerer after the Nigerian Civil War where Biafra was poorly prepared and the Nigerians were Brit trained.  In his time there, he became an agent for M16, the British intelligence service.  Makes you think of his spy books with a different eye, doesn't it?

"No Comebacks" from 1982 is a collection of 10 short stories, each and every one with a wonderful twist at the end.  "Hoist with one's own petard (wherever that may be located in the human body) is payback with a vengeance from characters a lot smarter  than I am.

Normally am not a short story fan but if they were all as good as this, I'd have to reverse course and become a huuuge fan!

Wednesday, June 24, 2020

New In The Time of Pestilence

Or "How bad do you want it?"  My monitor was going south on me; like it or not (not) time to toss it and replace.  Since Best Buy is about the only computer place in the South Bay, off we scooted.

To - what's this?  Their big parking lot was divided into lanes.  At the opening to this labyrinth was a guard with a white tent for sun shelter.  The guard asked what we were buying and when I said, "I need a new monitor," she replied, go ahead and drive up to the store front, park and wait on the sidewalk to get into the store.   I'll call them and tell them what you're buying so as to have a clerk for you."

"Well, well, indeed," I thought.  "is this service or what?"

Or what turned out to be a 1 1/2 hour wait, drifting around in the Monitor section.  Soon enough I found the monitor of my dreams (cheap) and since we'd brought the old post-hip surgery wheelchair to ferry the monitor in it's huge box back to the car*, it made a cozy seat to watch other customers surging along in the wake of a sales person in their uniform blue shirts.

By dint of being nice and explaining to the cashier that all we needed was to bring it to her so we could pay for it, she trotted docilely after us, scored the price on some gadget in her hand; we rolled our "cart" to her register;  I pulled out my credit card, ring ka ching and we were out the door.
It's working just fine and I'm staring at a crystal clear screen.  Of course, my back is killing me from such a long spell on a concrete floor, but … we've got a new monitor!

*All computer stuff comes in a ginormous container.  Ever noticed that?

Tuesday, June 23, 2020

There's Almost Always a Silver Lining

In this case, today it's the fact that I am well done (36 hours) of the effects of the last pill in a 6 day regime for L5 back problems.

The barely-opened bottle of Trader Joe's Venetian Moon Pinot Grigio is about to take a mortal hit.  Richie opened a whole bottle for a tablespoon of white wine in something he was cooking and it's been refrigerating cozily in the refrigerator ever since.  And I say to it, Pinot?  Your hour has come.

Which is the corollary about silver linings - they're not always for you.

Monday, June 22, 2020

YAY! An Outing!

During this "situation" that has affected us "an outing" is a rare treat indeed.  Today I scored a front row seat to the Tumbling Boulders Concert performed in Rock Sharp at Providence Imaging Center - 1:15 p.m. sharp for an MRI for Lumbar-ing 5 which has been plague ridden of late.

One's first MRI is usually a real shock to the nervous system.  The tech will have told you to expect loud noises which are; they will stress, the normal workings of the machine.  You are offered (or at least I have always been offered) a choice of ear-phoned music.  I have always taken "Classical" for the simple reason that if I chose Blues, I would be wiggling and contorting, dancing along with a driving beat which means the tech has to start all over again - and you have to be in the machine longer than you would have, had you just played possum.  'Nuff said.

But, hey!  it's an outing! Maybe we can even stop for a beer afterward to replace the champagne at intermissions in a real concert.  Good enough for L5 and me.

Sunday, June 21, 2020

Today We Celebrate

The Holiday Of The Soggy Breakfast In Bed - literally IN the bed as brought by loving off-spring hands trembling with their delicate burdens, eyes squinted in concentration.

Fathers Day is believed to date back to a memorial service for a group of miners in Mononga, West Virginia, who were all killed in a terrible below-ground accident in 1907.

Somehow this idea spread across the United States to Spokane, Washington, where Sonora Dodds in 1909 took it and ran with it as a follow-up to Mother's Day.

Get Mom to clean up the bed; she's had her holiday, ha ha

Saturday, June 20, 2020

Yo! Colin Kaopectate - Stand Up and Respect Our Flag

Miserable ass hat.  Stand up and consider this which clearly you didn't know (nor, astute critics might say, "Nor do you know much about anything.  Clearly nothing of history.")

William Harvey Carney, born 2/29, 1840, was a soldier in the Union Army who was a recipient of the Medal of Honor for battlefield actions.  In the Battle of Fort Wagner, when the color guard was shot, he nipped out, grabbed the flag and returned to his unit across an active battlefield where, by the way, he was severely wounded several times.  He greeted his group thusly, "The old flag never touched the ground!" triumphantly.

He has been credited with being the first black Medal of Honor recipient, but in truth, 20 other African Americans got one first, but because Carney's Battle of Fort Wagner came before all of the others' battles, Carney got top billing.

Post-war he became a mail carrier and worked at that for the next 32 years.  He died in Boston City Hospital in 1908 as a result of some kind of accident with an elevator in the Massachusetts State House.  He had been working at the time at the Department of State.

Look it all up Kaopectate - it's an interesting story about a man's bravery - something, of course, you know nothing about.  Taking A Knee.  wow. I'm not impressed. 

Friday, June 19, 2020

Beachlife in So. Calif.

Gov. Gavin Newsom, never to be re-elected, if there is a God, re-opened our beaches with a few caveats that Mallard Fillmore reports to us from his column (cartoon strip) in the Daily Breeze 6/19/20

I quote:

"And, finally, for anyone planning a beach visit this weekend, here are the latest regulations ...
Fishing is allowed, but only while jogging -
Volleyball is allowed, but only if the ball is completely deflated -
Sunbathing is allowed, but only in the shade -
Parking is allowed, but only ten miles away from the beach.
Stay safe and reasonable out there."

This is an exaggeration, true, but it's very much life in Southern California with a deranged Governor.  


Thursday, June 18, 2020

My Mother Always Said -

"If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all."

These times are too fraught to communicate.  Which, of course, rarely stops me.  These are exceptional times and call for strong measures.  This is one of them. Too keep my big mouth firmly shut.

Tuesday, June 16, 2020

City B - Still at the Beach

Same ride with a cop; different night.  It started out well enough; Officer X was friendly, very proud of something the station had just inaugurated - a little computer next to the driver for instant communication with Dispatch.  But as the evening wore on he paid more attention to flirting with said Dispatcher, than things around him such as - the car stopped at a red light right next to us.  I noted that he was apparently drinking a bottle of beer.  The other car driver.  The light changed and I pointed at that car, speeding modestly away from us; apparently Officer X was more interested in gossiping and merely nodded and said, "Eh, too late to chase him now" and off we went.

Earlier in the evening I had asked him if he ever had had any encounters with two of the denizens of that beach - Thumper and Cowboy.

I frequently saw the Cowboy in our library, reading Westerns.  He himself wore a rather battered cowboy hat and boots that had clearly covered a lot of territory..  Officer X said, "Aw, he's a nice guy - we know where he hangs out so if it's raining or bitter cold (at the beach seems unlikely but it happens) and bring him into the station for the night and offer him shelter and hot food; a harbor for the night."  

Thumper was the reverse of that coin.  Thumper was only ever seen wearing a red Speedo bathing suit and nothing else.  No one wanted to see that spectacle especially when he masturbated by rubbing his equipment on the sides of parked cars, thus "Thumper" for a name.  "Mommy, what's that funny man doing?"

 Another distinguishing note - both feet were missing the big toes which accounted for his rather lurching gait.  

Officer X said that when it gets too unbearable, they load him in a cop car and drive him to the far side of Torrance "And then we wait to see how long it takes for him to get back here. (musingly) "We ought to make book on it," sighed and went back to his protracted visit with Dispatch.  So ended that ride.  We parted cordially at the station.

Monday, June 15, 2020

Ridin' With John Law

The title John Law is or rather was, a real person; a neighborhood police officer who covered a specific territory protecting and serving with an exemplary good reputation.

Richie and I hadn't been married long, and I grew a little restive, missing writing jobs … getting paid for it and decided to approach both of the two local free newspapers.  The Beach Reporter went for it and "Occupations" was my weekly offering for some 22 issues.  A few people I remember - a nurse, a mailman, a garbage man- the superintendent told me, "I picked Juan because his English is the best among my men." and more including today's subject.  Rides with two police officers in two different beach towns.  I was looking for contrast and I got it.

City A - my tour began with a K9 officer and we were called to check out an excess noise complaint. It was a nice residential area and Officer Woofs  hopped out and walked  up to the front porch.  The dog and I were left to guard the police car.  We sat quietly; the dog showed no separation anxiety at all at a missing master nor when a bratty cat jumped up on the hood of the cop car and nervily marched right up to the windshield and looked in.  Dog never moved.  Not a twitch.  When Officer X was once again back in the car, I commented on this and he grinned, and said, "Part of their training." fired up the car and back to the station for shift change.

Officer Mark and I replaced them both.  Our first call was a drunk and disorderly down by the water.  She'd had been overserved at one of the posh restaurants bars along there and the bouncer was the person who reported it, complaining, "She socked me! and God forbid if I smacked her back. She's got a mouth and some language that would make a sailor blush," he said.  Officer Mark grinned, took the transfer of the woman from the bouncer, bundled her into back of the car "Mind your head there" and off we went.
 She never said anything (I was disappointed; wanted to upgrade my own vocabulary) but she did sob quietly all the way to the station.

We were walking out the station back door when we got a call "Palm tree on fire - Catalina in front of Blue Water Grill.   See if the fire department's needed."  We went.  They weren't.

"Do people try to set palm trees on fire often?"  I asked.  "Weekends mostly," he replied, "a lot of  drunks think it'd be a fun thing to do.  They don't realize that palm trees are not fireplace logs. For one thing, they're a living thing. "   Whoever the perpetrator here had been, they were long gone. leaving only some char marks near the base of this particular tree.

And boom!  Another call for Officer Mark.  A woman had called; "I hit a bicyclist at the left turn from Catalina to 190th street.  He's up, he's not hurt, but …"  very much the good citizen.

She was easily found because she and the bicyclist were chatting; his intact bike was laid down in the gutter.

Mark allowed me out of the car so that I could hear and see what happened next.  The woman said that she was a flight attendant, just in from the JFK run; very tired and didn't see him.  The bicyclist looked dubious.  She now launched into a self-defense stressing this deathless prose, "I didn't have to call the police you know!"   To my amazement, Mark didn't bitch slap her into next week and then arrest her, but all parties, business completed, we were soon back in the car speeding away.  I called him on it with some color and he laughed and said, "Aw nobody got hurt," flapping a disinterested hand.

It had not passed me by that she was a very comely young lady and easy to forgive (for unbelievable insolence)  by the unharmed bicyclist and officer alike.  And so ended my ride that night.

Saturday, June 13, 2020


Dale is back!  The Tonsorial Parlor, located in El Segundo, is cuttin' hair once more!  And we get to have haircuts!

It will be old home week because the last time we saw Dale was February 21st - 2020 although it feels like maybe February 21st, 1974.

According to the American Academy of Dermatology human hair grows at the rate of 1/2 in. per month.  Based on these calculations, they said one could grow 6 in. at the end of a year.  Richie might be doing that as he hates getting a haircut.  For all of our marriage and courtship, he has been virtually a life  support system for his hair.  It wasn't until I grabbed a side shot of him in a mask (which flattened it out) that I ever saw what he could look like with a grown-ups hair cut after 39 years of marriage and courtship.

On a tour of Ireland in 2006, from Dublin to Shannon NONE of the Irish males had a mop like he did and does.  His only comment?  "They just wish they had this hair."

And I wished he didn't.

Friday, June 12, 2020

The Covid19 - 5

This is a diversion for the terminally bored that, in fact, is actually good for us!  We all know what Covid19 is but here the 5 represents the 5 pounds it is possible that many stay home; stay in  added to total body weight during these times of stress.  It is believed in some psychological circles (many of which are discredited) that stress and boredom are two of the great appetite stimulants.  

Well our challenge is to lose the 5ver but not deprive ourselves of the nourishing good help available to do this - substitutions!  A small sample of tricks - salsa and baby carrots to dip, not taco chips

Potato chips and sour cream onion dip - use no-flavor anyhow yogurt for the sour cream.

Soup or better still broth heated to boiling and served in a heavy coffee mug are filling, nay sating, and very low-calorie.  If memory serves - a whole can of chicken broth 30 cals total.    The pinch of onion powder, garlic powder and cayenne pepper I put in my are poof - a wave of the hand - inconsequential as far as any added calories.

Bonus points:  boiling hot is air conditioning for the rest of the body.  Just ask the Brits who popularized hot tea in India.  (Or something like that.)

Thursday, June 11, 2020

The New Entertainment/Tail Gate Event

And that would be defacing, beheading and toppling statues of people determined by other people to be racist (a word I am very, very tired of.)

Apparently the goal of these vandals is to somehow shame people who have been dead for a great many years and undoubtedly unable to respond to this act of sheer lawlessness - defacing public property is a legally punishable event.

All it serves to do - the vandalism - is to make a great many people scratch their heads and wonder who the hell the statue represented?   Astute wonderers will then look the person up and maybe get a bit of history and a deeper understanding of their actions.  Or not.

While history cannot be changed; it can be misinterpreted.  If all you can see out of your glasses is "racism" on the part of another, that is a very sad commentary.  Don't invite them to your Statue Pulling.

Tuesday, June 9, 2020

For A Light Heart

Reader's Digest features "Funniest Jokes Ever - from A to Z."  Sadly I'd heard at lest 80% of them so odds are good that you have, too.  So - new material as individuals report in.

Waiter to wife dining out with her husband,  "You can substitute broccoli for the asparagus, but you can't substitute another glass of wine for the French Fries."  For some reason, thought of my little sister …

Southern advice:  Fry it, then try it.

Our job as parents is to put ourselves out of a job.

Corollary, "I am what you would call a "piece of work" in progress.

People freak out because of a shark in the ocean.  Er, they live there!  If you see them at MacDonald's, then there's a problem.

"Hermit crab" describes me twice.

A Yo, Mamma - Yo mama so old when she was a kid, rainbows were black and white.

"I make mistakes and I'm the second to admit it," playwright Jean Kerr.

Monday, June 8, 2020

What Floyd's Loved Ones May Be Thinking

"Can we please finally get our George in the ground and let us mourn in our own time, in private?"  I think they'd be well-due after such intrusions as these ...Floyd's 2nd grade teacher is proudly exhibiting an essay he wrote, age 8, 38 years ago.  This former teacher explained that for every class,  there was one big project a year and she kept at least one or two from each class.  He was one of her students and she remembers him as a quiet boy.

Floyd wanted to be a Supreme Court Justice.  He wrote what he would do in Court.  "I'd bang my hammer and everyone would sit down," is a sample.  source boredpanda.com

A protestor in Bristol, GB, and friends pulled down a statue of one Edward Colston, a 17th century slave trader for an African firm who apparently handled exporting slaves in 1680.  To me this is treading all tippy toe with an attempt to change history.  No, don't laud him; but don't erase him either.  Slavery happened; it existed.  No it is and was a horrendous thing.  But it happened.

Another protester in London, defaced a statue of Winston Churchill, saying that "Churchill fought the Nazis to protect colonials, not people of color."  

If anyone ever tells this protestor that Harry Truman desegregated the Army in WW2, maybe he'll call for a statue to be erected to Harry!

We can only hope the coin has two sides, not just one.

Sunday, June 7, 2020

Appropriate On A Sunday, No?

Quoting from Psalm 91  It seems so appropriate … back when this was written how did they know?  Very nearly eerie.

You will not fear the terror of night nor the arrow that flies by day
Nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness nor the plague that destroys at midday.
A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you.
You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked.

Wear the mask; carry the gloves.  

Saturday, June 6, 2020

Baby Steps - Come to Mama!

Referring to the way we are being reluctantly fed tiny bits of freedom.

Such as:  we can't saunter  into a restaurant, sit at a table with gleaming napery and silver silverware "And that amusing little wine we had when we were here before."  Hah!  Phone, burn gas, get it home and invariably heat it up  and then dish it out.  The only difference being that odds are great that a pro chef cooks better than we do.

So we went and got it from Las Brisas once, Charlie's, a NY Joint twice* and Madera's for the shrimp we adore - pepper jack-stuffed inside bacon wrapped shrimp.  But Thursday!  Las Brisas was open for sit-down-in-our-restaurant dinner!  We enjoyed the patio all by ourselves, but it was only 5:30 p.m.      *Charlie's Shrimp Scampi appetizer is utter bliss - but not available.  "Charlie's not buying shellfish" right now" I was told.   Translation:  no one's coming in for take out.  So we got pasta dishes and a 10 in. Jersey crust pepperoni and pineapple pizza for me.   (Richie, born in Brooklyn) thinks this is an offense to God,Man and Decent People.  First time I got it, I thought he as going to demand a different seat away from me - to not have to see it.

And in contrast we also got Spumoni once.  Richie loves Chicken Cacciatori and I Priest Strangler Carbonara. $27 each and we ate leftovers for the next three days.

The above was in a three month period and we normally go out for dinner once a week.  Now we can!   If we can find one of our favorites that is DOING sit-down meals.  Tin Roof Bistro for one.

But of even greater momentum is that we can now get haircuts!  Dale, owner and manager and superb cutter of  hair, said that he's booked up and has been working seven days a week from early to late.  We have appointments at 1 p.m. Saturday June 13th.  HURRY THE DAY!

Looking for specific changes - wash your hair at home.  No more courtesy tea or coffee; no more supermarket trashbloids - so riveting except that now that I'm so old, I never heard of probably 80 per cent of the players.
Expect a temperature check on entering and you will wear your mask during your visit.
Possibly wait in your car to be brought in.   Pay generously and there may be an additional Coronavirus fee to pay for the presumed gallons of disinfectant used after every cut.

Thursday, June 4, 2020

Suspension of Disbelief Because No One Could Be This Brainless

In rapid succession - the Del Amo Mall, and the Torrance Target a short distance away, as of Wednesday had been closed and barricaded for fear of rioters/looter-thieves for three days.  The Sunday night arrestees were 17 adults and 7 juveniles - for grand theft auto, possession of stolen goods. curfew violations.

Mull that over while I type this - BREAKING NEWS
LA Mayor Garcetti, L A City Leaders call for cutting LAPD funding as protests continue.

The Police Officers Union calls the motion "offensive."  I can call it a lot of things that would be better than "offensive"  Bone-headed stupid would be the least of it.  

Apparently the "LA City Leaders" have never read the below which comes from the Washington Post and the WSJ:

2019 - Police shot 9 unarmed blacks - and 19 unarmed whites.

2018 - 53 % of Blacks committed known homicides  and 60% of the robberies.

A cop is 18 1/2 times more likely to be killed by a black male than a black killed by a white cop.
Further:  Whites are less likely to shoot than Black or Hispanic officers.  

"So let's cut their funding!"  the geniuses bellow.  Sometimes I wish there was a bounty on these beauties.


or in other words, "Walk right in, make yourselves at home."


Wednesday, June 3, 2020

The Protestors vs. Effective Change

Let us have a refreshing sip from the First Amendment Cup I see being passed around various locations at this time.   What's it all about?

The First Amendment, in order:   they are 
Free Speech - any damned thing you feel like saying 
Freedom of Religion - government cannot force you into one religion or another
Freedom of the Press - unless or until what they write is seditious, slander.  Insults, fine!
Right to Assembly - although it should be said that trying to march on an active freeway is not a good idea.
The right to petition the government.  For all of the good it will bring you.

What is the Effectiveness of a Mass Protest - Aye or Nay?

Hong Kong has been anti-government in the tens of thousands of it's citizens who are going up against the police.   A  controversial extradition law was rescinded, but cops are still sent out from the government for mass beatings of their fellow citizens .

Iraq protestors are anti-government and their zeal has caused 95 of them to die.  Iraq uses live ammo.

The Green New Deal espoused by professional child activist Greta Thunberg - Congress didn't pass it and neither did all 50 states.  A scenario I'd pay money to see - couple of Congressmen discussing her after a recent appearance, "Cute kid," - "Yeah, little smart ass; where the hell were her parents?"

Successful protests over the years - protestors are clearly a stubborn bunch  -
Both, after years, have gotten recognition.

 India - Civil Rights Movement
LGBTQUA  All the way back to the Stonewall episode.  

Pros and Cons re participating in a mass protest

All that walking?  You can skip the gym

Looting is often included in protesting.

Toting those big screen TVs and/or boxes of Manalo Blahnick shoes, Gucci frocks - gives you a power lifting workout, too.   Mattresses, those desirable big screen TVs - remember that before making your selection;  they aren't feather light.

Aerobics - playing dead on the street but sneaking in some yoga moves and pass it off as death throes.  Unless, of course, you were actually shot.  No acting required.

If everyone else got to Chanel first, leaving nothing for you - well pouting and kicking curbs is a great way to vent which is good psychologically speaking.
All for the betterment of mankind.  

Tuesday, June 2, 2020


Coroner vs Coroner in the matter of the George Floyd autopsy.

I went to a still shot of The Incident and was damned if I could see it.  As always I went to my medical consultant who has never failed to answer me completely.  I e'd RH Gutierrez, MD, San Diego

I pointed out that the man looked as if he was a body builder and thus, would have an extremely strong neck.  And he wrote back -

"I am about to do a video on it.  The knee across the neck is compressing the trachea which can cause a parasympathetic response to both  which  can cause decreases in respiration

On top of that, there were three men compressing his chest and torso.  Even without any medical conditions, this can lead to decreased breathing especially when prolonged (this can then shut off the circulation.)

On top of that the chest compressions will decrease cardiac output and decreased venous return - both of which can kill.

Then there is the decreased cerebral perfusion and this can cause brain damage and death.

The cops killed this man in six ways."

So now you know.  Do not try them at home. ed.  

To see explanatory videos of the doctor, Google  KARATEDRSANDIEGO itpp://karatedr.com 

Monday, June 1, 2020

Having a Riot* of a Night!

The 6 p.m. news was a constant  giving us local and world news; natural disasters "Volcano eats five little children in the great Ice Floe Accident.  Careless parents cited.  Cruise ship line regrets."

Not these days.  I fully expect that commercials in the immediate future (i.e. tonight) for the station will go like this:  For your dining pleasure, ABC 7  proudly presents live! and in color riot coverage!  Our helicopters are costing us a fortune in gas so as they're up there from 10 a.m. to last bust at night.  Pick up your pre-dinner cocktail and settle on your beat-up divan, call for delivered dinner and loll deeper in the couch and enjoy the fun!  Live!

Late Night TV Commercial -
Comes with a sledgehammer to deal with those pesky stores that think a locked door can stop us! (chortle)  In addition you get a fold-away hand truck for the big stuff like 55 in. TVs.  As a "thank you for your purchase" we are including four designer pillow cases!  Two for each hand for the smaller but no less profitable items.  May we suggest perfume, famous name face creams, perfume and/or  jewelry.  Additionally,  we will throw in a large container of powdered milk and a bottle of water.  Don't suffer the stinging effects of tear gas!

All of this packed in our special Lotter's Kit Bag for the low, low price of $1,200.  After all, we need to make a living, too!  What better way than to score off of the dudes that got the loot!

This ad paid for by Looters At Large, a subsidiary of Bilkers R Us.

Amuse yourself at dinner by tallying the number of looters sporting our distinctive kit bags!  You're in good company!

*  The anti-looting comments by this author are directed to the ANTIFA thugs, who have probably never seen a window or a lock they didn't want to break.