Sunday, August 3, 2014

So - Where're You From? II

The Indians
The meals will all be vegetarian.  Their names most often are Patel or Singh.  A Frank wrote that he once asked, "Could passenger Patel turn on his call button?" and couldn't believe the ensuing noise in the gallery.

Personal aromas may in some cases be rather noticeable.  Many Indian religions are so adamant about excluding alcohol that wearing deodorant is not permitted.

The Australians and the New Zealanders
Caution again about mixing up groups.  Any one of either group will make it abundantly clear to anyone who is foolish enough to ask that they are entirely separate entities.  General speaking they are all friendly enough and usually very sleepy having come incredible distances just to get to the right destination. 

The Germans
Contrary to my own belief that all Germans are Nazis, A Frank thinks they are just a dandy bunch.  But Catering needs to be reminded if most of the pax are German and that it will be necessary to stock 90 per cent beef meals and that the bar will need a great deal of extra beer. 

The Russians
They are said to be very appreciative of American-based carriers because Aeroflot ("Aeroflop" in airline jargon) is so very bad.  They don't believe it's safe to check baggage and stagger on board with enormous suitcases.

The Scandinavians
Because liquor is so expensive at home, they will drink every drop available on the plane.  And, having depleted that supply, will nip into the duty-free bottles they are carrying (against flight rules.)  Amazingly enough, they rarely show any signs of inebriation. 

The Scots
A Frank loves them.  He says they are usually cheerful and courteous with kind words and a ready grin.  His only problem with them as a group is that it is very difficult to understand a word they are saying. 

The South Americans
They love hot chocolate and when they've gone through any on board, they'll ask for a cup of coffee and put about seven packets of sugar in it.  And when they want anything, they will say, "Psst!" or click their fingers to get your attention.  They are for the most part affable.

Female beauty is celebrated with gusto there and the gorgeous 22 year old you see across the aisle and up a row may actually be only 12!  Gentlemen, eyes on the i.d. if you please.

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