Monday, June 21, 2021

Airline Jokes

American ex-ing out flights  left and right reminded me of some old jokes when for no discernible reason,  poking fun at airlines had  brief rise in popularity.    

TWA - Try Walking Awhile.  People apparently did - TWA is long gone.  United - Untied

What did the football player say to the Flight Attendant?  "Put me in Coach"  

Long ago -  These two were said to have occurred at Newark (EWR) outbound.

Lufthansa had done recount after recount of passengers (pax) and other flights were stacking up behind it. The line behind was getting longer and longer and those pilots were getting angrier and angrier.  Finally one of the waiting pilots, said, "Lufthansa, check your ovens!"

Inside that flight, the captain came on and said, "Ve are ready for take-off an I wat you to put on your set belts and I vant to hear vun click."  

A flight had to be cancelled due to weather and a male passenger is furious.  He storms up to the gate agent, ranting and raving - he has to get home for his twin two-year old's birthday  as the agent tries to calm him down.  His temper increases until he is in such a rage that he whips out his business and pees right on her kiosk.  He is putting his business away when she looks out at the angry mob around her and says, "You fathered twins with that?"  Bystanders nearly wet their own pants laughing.

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