Monday, June 18, 2018

NOooooooo! Not the Vuvuzela!!!!!

The use of the vuvuzela at sporting events began in 2009 so we have only been annoyed by them at World Cup events every four years or 2009, 2012, 2016.  I think.  Am not good at math.  Save your scathing comments on it; have already heard them all.  "And, yet she persists …"

Wondering what corner of hell they had been sent to torture us, I looked them up.  They go far back to South Africa where they were used to summon far-flung villages to a meeting.  Since the advent of teleconferencing and Skype, I see no reason to keep them for any use whatsoever.  Moreover they disrupt the game since the players can't hear the coaches and the players are just as annoyed at them as the audience.

Did you know that their 120dB(A) is also the pain threshold for our ears and can cause permanent hearing loss if used less than 3 ft. 3 in. from our ears?  One vuvuzela manufacturer did have the class to sell a pair of ear plugs with each horn sold.

At least we only have to put up with them every four years whereas the wheezing 6-note fanfare of the  baseball organ is every game throughout the too long season.  If I didn't already find baseball as boring as doing the laundry, I think it's a pussy bunch of players.  "Ooo!  Ooo! He broke the little finger of his non-dominant hand!  OMG!" being an example.   I suspect that they all secretly wear bubble gum pink underpants or lacy thongs under those uniforms.  It would be appropriate.

World Cup at least has some interest in watching the players tear up and down an enormous field at full speed.  They do very little else, but at least there's an impression on the viewers that they're trying to do something.   Baseball?  Not so much.  They're rather sit on a folding chair in the outfield and count their money.

Still and all, it takes all kinds and good for those that love their sport.  Just - could you please leave the vuvuzela at home to scare midnight burglars or something?   Thank you.  Much appreciated.


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