Miss Manners at Work

"Miss Manners Minds Your Business" by Judith Martin and son Nicholas Martin   W. W. Norton and Co.   302 pages   $26.95

As a long-time fan of Manners, I seized upon her latest book.  Not because I am planning to actually get a job!  Perish the very thought!  But I was curious about how many things in an office setting would be new or strange to an old war horse like myself. 

Some of her ideas for a cultured (yet prosperous) office setting seemed rather dated to me.  For instance, to write a thank you note after a job interview.  And it should be handwritten on good paper.  In today's fiber optics-dominated world?

I agree whole-heartedly that when someone does something for one or is given something - whether expensive or merely a trinket - thanks are in order.

Miss Manners told me that writing the note keeps you fresh in the interviewers mind so that if you didn't get that job, down the road there may be another one and the note serves as notice that you are alive and well and just itching to get a job with that company. 

She uses the Q and A method, answering queries from people with specific questions.  Should a wife throw a retirement party for her husband?  No is the answer because he probably has work friends that would like nothing better to take him out for a drink or dinner. 

Miss Manners deplores "Casual Friday" dress.  She feels that a workplace is designed to promote  a professional air for the company.  She feels that the CEO who has to look out over a surge of men wearing earrings or women with cocktail party (or street corner) plunging necklines must wring his hands in impotent despair.  She adds that of course you want to "be you" -- but is that the "you" you want to be? 

Miss Manners suggests that management issue a memo, outlining in no uncertain terms exactly what constitutes "casual" in an office.  And then drop the word "casual" forevermore. 

Office Christmas parties - Miss Manners sums them up drily with this remark:  It still provides every employee an opportunity to obliterate a promising career in one carefree moment.