Tuesday, October 22, 2013

When To Buy It

Mark Di Vincenzo has a cottage industry going with his two books.  The first was "Buy Ketchup in May and Fly at Noon;" now comes "Buy Shoes on Wednesday and Tweet at 4 (p.m.)" 

Thursday is the best day to tweet.  Only 18 per cent of college students twitter (whatever that is) so you don't have to do it either!

I've never paid much attention to "when to buy" something.  If you need one, you go buy one is my thinking.  I do know about January White Sales and I know that for 28 years I have unsuccessfully resisted Richie's insistence on buying next year's Christmas cards the day after Christmas.  This annoys me because I want our cards to be brilliant or funny or innovative and not shriek "Picked over and rejected!"

Di Vincenzo certainly seems to know his onions (and when to buy them.)  Here are some random selections -

Fresh and soft cheeses are good for two weeks after the sell-by date.  Medium and hard cheeses can last for three to six months.

The best time to dye your hair is when it's slightly dirty because the faint film of hydro lipid will protect your scalp from the chemicals in the dye.

Buy life insurance before your next birthday because the rates go up a bit each year.

Uncle Hubert is in jail (again) so what's the best time of day to wire him some money?  At 9 a.m. when the bank opens.  It'll have the best chance of getting there the same day. 

Try for a Wednesday appointment with your doctor.  Mondays are full of weekend sufferers and Tuesdays cover the patient that couldn't be seen on Monday.

Try to go to bed between 9 or 10 p.m. and get up at 6 or 7 a.mm.  Yes, you're sleeping but your body is working.  From 9 to 11 p.m. your lymph glands are detoxifying; from 11 to 1 a.m. our livers are sweeping the floor and tidying up.

"Buy Shoes on Wednesday and Tweet at 4 - More of the Best Times to Buy This, Do That and Go There" by Mark Di Vincenzo  William Morrow   221 pages   $13.99

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