Hah! Gotcha!

April 1 aka April Fools.

Only one I can remember show's it's antiquity.  you'll need a spool of thread for the needle  . because you' are  going to take the threaded needle and, choosing a very visible spot, run a threaded with your trusty needle leaving a long "tail"  dangling  smack in your face.    Other theThe humor:  

The person who made this discovery  will tug on the thread tail.  

and it will keep right on unspooling  The thread will keep unloading.  The face on the puller will reflect the distaste of the thread-puller.

Huh? you say?  This was back in high school - mine not yours.  Google

Visit and Query Funniest  April Fools Day jokes; there're a lot of them  After all who knew what needles and thread were for other than decorative  "Oh my aunt made the most beatiful counted cross stitch for me for my birthday,  She joked that it took a year to make it ,"she said of the finished product "It's for two birthdays!"

Enjoy your April 1st - laugh your butt off!

Little Did We Know

Liberals are  going around blaming  Trump for the slap heard round the world 

Today's Headline, courtesy Dail Breeze

This greeted us from our driveway:

OSCARS Develop Case of Stage  Fight 

Cool, no?

OSCARS! STARTING AT 5 P.M.

(Reaction)  YAWN biggr amd deeper than the Grand Canyon 

Is Putin Gay?

 I read in an extrememly  trashy tabloid that he was,  article was illustrated by an erver so gentile picture of two men having tea - dainty little cups and all.

Putin - Ow you dawg!

Four year courtship;  Ludmilla didn't think he was proposing but about to dump her.  "He looked happy when I said, 'Yes'

They married and had two daughters.  Don't know if it was marital boredom; fatigue at having to hide but a divorce  put paid to divorce.  

Putins' next trip down lovers lane involved taking up with a gymnast who was a flight attendant for Aeroflot or as it is known  to those in the airline business:  Aeroflop  

More to come.  

Due to Putin's obsession with discretion  any research I've  somehow dug out was hard

Quick and Dirty or Easy as Lying

World's Fastest Mac

1 box of  Velveeta 1 bag of macaroni   Cook macaroni Drain and add Velveeta  Mix well  Serve

Salt and pepper pasta

Cook amount of favorite pasta, drain.  Either add proper jar sauce OR (my favorite - toss with olive oil and several grinds of rainbow pepper and salt)

A Site To See  - fruit gone bad  Did you know that you can tell a woman's mood from her hands ?At a glance?   Yes -- if she's carrying a gun go elsewhere as fast as you can

The Day Caught Up and Over Me

Yeah you've never had that, 

I wanted to tell you  some time  saving meals.  But you can save some   right now - quit reading this!

W'e will see you tomorrow

Today's Treat - Getting our taxes done

Well you may wonder at the mind that thinks this is a 'treat'  I do though because I deliberately book a time that coincides with lunch.  The treat is Factor's Famous Deli Pico, Beverly Hills, and their corned beef sandwiches.  We no longer have a deli at the beach- not enough Jews I guess.  So this is really a treat as we're too lazy to make a trip that far north.  

The Dancing Priest

To be more accurate, the stripping priest; no dancing  at the celebration of  life - one of his fellow ramp mangers at AA.  It was held at a VFW lodge.  He peeled off his robes at the end of the celebration leaving a somewhat gobsmacked audience.  Ah, some tradition has lasted though - he was an Irish priest.

$43.00 for a Piece of Heaven

Thursday we met our dear friend Dee on the patio of the Hermosa Saloon (Mouton was playing golf.  He's always playing golf.  Yeah, hooked.)   We had Monika with us though.  Richie nicknamed her "The Polish Tornado for the speed at which she punches through life.

The four of us chose to sit at a bench and table in full sunshine out in a spacious patio and proceeded to 3 beers and one lemonade.  Dee is also of Polish descent and he and Monika enjoyed discovering   the similarities.  Grandmothers figured bigly in their tales.

The Hermosa Salon  211 PCH, Hermosa   Fairly reasonable/y priced - sample:3 Stellas $32

1 Pacifico $7.50  For  a grand total of $43.25 - place to have a cold one?  FREE !

Monica doesn't drink so ordered a lemonade.  This is becoming "a thing"  Her drink was free.

Revenge of the Yachless

Source: Drudge Report - an oligarch's yacht is being held  not for ransom as we know it but never the less stuck  in a Norwegian port.  The captain refuses to buy gas there.

Sounds Like Something My Dad Would Do

Two pilots are planning to sky dive into each other's planes IN FLIGHT.  Or so they are planning.

One is sponsored by Red Bull; the other by Hulu.  Damned waste of two good airplanes my Dad would say.  He should know,  in the late 20's ;early '30s he and his thrill seeking bestie and him flew in an  air  circus.  That is, my Dad flew in it until another circus member had to cancel a performance .  Daddyy nailed the wing walker but came a cropper (literally) when his parachute failedAnd didn't open for 1,200 ftt landing at 50 ft in a forlorn frield of dried-up corn stalks.

Source  Drudge Report  Pilots to Swap Planes in Air

O Gawd

The 5 most dreaded words in the English language - I've got the dentist today.  

Silver lining:  She numbs my gums

This just in from the Num-ber  Club ( for dental work only)  Its the same old gel contents but this time  same gel has been forced into an aerolspray can it is then sprayed all along the tooth line.  Absolutely no   pain and lasts just as long as needed.  I dozed all of the time she was working.

- 

Idle Thoughts

 Watching the TV News last night I was surprized at the numbers of little kids walking along  with stuffed animals.  And though the toys weren't heavy - like lugging an entire  train set they would  eventually get there  so in an effort  to be kind  don't buy  stuffed  animals for their parents .  It's a dubious kindnes;

Time Change is no ones friend.  Remember an old song?  "Does anyone know what time it is?"

So when you see an ad soliciting Support Ukraine, send cash - doesn't weigh any thing and goes everywhere

Family History -

Always another side of the story - so!  My sister wrote about Ukraine and Kansas but this is my version:  once upon a time:  there was a small village "owned by the tsar."  He decided to raise the rent the villaged sat on.  They were incensed.  To say the least.  About then they began hearing about a wonderful  place called "Kansas."  The adults voted and decided to send they village elders to this wonderfulness if only for the gift of 640 acres to each family FREE.  And  checked and the land was rich and  productive; perfect for growing red wheat, their specialty hence the ensuing nickname Breadbasket of America?)

Anyway the entire village moved in toto to Kansas.  What no one told the villagers was that it was winter time and what with one thing or another the villagers hadn't had time to build houses and they had to live that first winter in the  boxcars that they rode into their area in Kansas,

And with the arriving villagers came John and Anna, a pair of 12 year old orphans  -whom would become my mother's parents.  As a result, I'm only 2nd generation.

An Interesting juxtaposition of Ukraine and the great State of Kansas!

 My younger sister loves poking - or  jabbing - the family tree

Meant to be - The Sunflower is the official  flower of both.  I don't  think )of sunflowers and a slavic country somehow.   

Today it's  interesting because it links our  mother's her family  to Ukraine    particularly  the ones who came to Kansas (others went to Soth Dakota and Pennsylvania..)  My younger sister wrote the following:

I HAVEANCESTRAL TIE TO UKRAINE

The recent posts by Kansas friends regarding Ukraine as the "bread basket of Europ3with the same state flower  prompted  me to look into my Mennonite great grandparents.  today's were under Russian rule.

But come 1870 unacceptable changes were coming so a delegation of 12 of the 45,000 in South Russia.10,000 departed for South Dakota and some settled in Penn.  The country of Ukraine has a fascinating history.  Recommended reading

Who Let the Sheep out?

W're having huge, strong winds today.   Richie looked this up and found and found it's traveling at 28 mph  WxW.   It feels like a hella lot of noise for "only" 28mph.  Well idle speculation is of no particular value here,

Now to tackle this sheep thing.  It's rather obscure if you don't speak French .  Because of this lurid wind, we decided to go to our favorite Pacific viewing spot  certain that said ocean would be in an uproar.  we took a ride down the shore.  And our lovely navy blue ocean was awash in white foam..  To be blunt I immediately got it about the French's they looked like sheep butts.  A mature sheep is a Mouton not only in French but on  many a menu.

Once upon a time our neighbors across a stairwell at The Peppertree apartments lived in peace and happiness.  - us newly married, Dee Air Force Acadamy graduate  and  punch line Rich Mouton all lived happily together.  Dining in one or nor another's home they were and air Dodger 

In the ensuing years Mouts  my nickname for him for Mouton got married a couple of times; more recently Dee has overcome The Virus and no longer is tethered to a rolling oxygen tank after 26 days in ICU.

A happy event. And all of us are healthy and happy.  The only semi-bad thing is that the wind is so strong you can't hear the sheep bellowing.  I think they bellow but damned if I know.

The Name's the Same But It's a Different Menu

Tin Roof Bistro, Manhattan Beach

I love their Fig and Pig pizza - chunk bacon and cooked figs.  Richie, born in Brooklyn thinks this is a barbarous combination and desecrates "real" pizza  He had their enormous hamburger named after the starter of the place and sneered at me the whole time. 

Reassurance for Tin Roof Bistro junkies.  Tin Roof Bistro Maui! Front Street. 

Different Menu you may be sure

Kimchi 

Dashi broth  

Both ring the cash register at $2  Believe me there are no $2 items in the Manhattan Beach branch!

But Maui does have something we don't  Fleetwood Mac's place which is more Hawaiian than the place itself.  Lobster and shrimp roll with jalapena sauce$18

Beer-steamed mussels$24

Crab and Corn fritters $13

Opened by Fleetwod his very own self on 8/23/2012  

And how do I know the above?  My younger sister and my bro-in-law are on Maui as I type.

The Fine Art of the Oblique Insult

My good side ( I do too, have one) says not to espouse it but this is at least some what intellectual.

In the '8s a Prime Minister remarked about the time that a bunch of New Zealanders moved to Australia, "Raising the IQ of both places," he said .Probably said by all.

Such a waste you're a  lesbian.

To someone holding a home made item, "Who helped you?" Nod to holder.

"I was complimented fpr looking so good in my 40s.  I was 35.

Trophy presentation "You tried."

Dad to me:  "You're the son I never had."  Self, "Thanks, Dad."

"I hope your day is as nice as you are."

Error 401

Whatever that may mean.  I think the error this time - "State of the Union" is in the title of a Presidential address.

It's prime time tonight with Bident's speech on just that.  A few samples.  

dismal

sad

this one is at least   brief:  fucked!  or more politely  SNAFU