When Some Husbands Go Clothes Shopping With Their Wife

What can go wrong you ask?  Hah!  The wife can discover unexpected personality disorders in some cases.

And I just happen to have two examples.  Both took place in the same store so there's no variable there.  Such as while you clothes shop at Target, he can browse the Automotive Dept. and both of you are happy.  But, when it is not a store with diversions for males, it's a whole new ballgame.

First Incident:  This was several years ago.  Richie was with me because I was still gimping on a walker from hip surgery.  The sales lady helpfully pointed out the several deep couches for the non-participants waiting pleasure.  He sat, I shopped and when I felt I had taken enough advantage of the store sales, I went to the cashier.  Faster than a speeding bullet, he was there, pulling out his wallet.  "Let me get this," he said in best Daddy Warbucks accents.  So I did.  When he looked at the receipt, he gasped and it was obvious that he'd wished he'd kept his mouth shut.

He clutched his chest, grimacing mightily to amuse the cashier and paid.  As we walked away, him toting the clothing bag, I looked at him and said, "I told you, you can't afford me!"

Second Incident:  yesterday, after the monthly French class luncheon at El Torito this time, I told him that I had business at The Store.  He eagerly acquiesced and away we went.  He was in a restless mood and kept dragging hangars of clothes over to me, asking, "Do you like this?  What about that?" which is annoying because I knew exactly what I wanted and he is gifted at finding abominations I would never wear.  .

So, to get rid of him,  I said, "See if you can find the Perfect Shorts, size 10.  Eagerly he hared off and I went back to browsing the sale racks.  Sooner than I would have liked, he was back with a pair of shorts - one navy blue, the other snow white.  "Here's all of them I could find."  I looked at him and I said, "Richie, what color shorts am I wearing? (answer snow white size 10 Perfect Shorts)"

He said, defensively, "You said size 10 shorts."

Richie is too literal to take shopping.  Even if he pays when I can't sneak my card out fast enough and beat him to the register.  So what if peace and harmony while shopping come at a price?  It's worth it!