7/31/09 (Long Beach, CA) A police sergeant reported that one Sharon Tumich, 45, apparently stole a police car before dawn Thursday when an officer had left it unattended to conduct an investigation. Having "acquired" it, she drove it some 20 miles to a Boyle Heights gas station where she must have been apprehended.
Sadly, the account also labeled her as "a woman who may be mentally ill." C'mon! (elbow nudge) Who hasn't wanted to steal a cop's car -- or better still, a fire engine!
My sights have been set on a fire engine for quite some time. I do NOT want to have anything to do with a cop car -- they have GUNS in them!
I'm sure that a Freudian shrink would say of my desire to borrow an engine, "Oh, classic case of penis envy -- big, heavy, powerful, shooting streams..." That is SO not true. I have no desire whatsoever for that kind of "equipment" -- think about it - men have these bits and bobs hanging off of them; women are neatly and tidily constructed.
No, I'd just like to see the looks on the fire fighters faces. Having two cousins who are/were fire captains and by virtue of CERT classes (taught by firefighters) and various Open House days in stations, I feel that I know them and appreciate their wicked sense of humor among themselves. Naturally, any competitive person wants to top that!
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