French Lessons

"La Seduction - How the French Play the Game of Life" by Elaine Sciolino Time Books 338 pages $27

Sciolino is imminently qualified to write about the French as she is the former Paris bureau chief for the NY Times. She was decorated as a Chevalier in the Legion of Honor and lives in Paris.

But I think she erred when the crux of her argument about the French is based on only one thing: seduction. She says that here in America "seduction" has a sexual connotation; there it does not. Much of the interactions between men and women in France would have been better described as "flirtation." One flirts to be liked. Simple as that.

Diplomats use seduction. Richard Holbrooke, the late American diplomat convinced Madeleine Albright, at the time Secretary of State, to let him be the chief administrator of Kosovo by picking a bouquet of edelweiss and presenting it to her. She grew up in Prague near the mountains and presumably edelweiss.

French politicians try to seduce men and women into voting for them. Valery Giscard d'Estaing was famous even in his 80s (!) for trying to seduce the ladies, going so far as to write a novel about "a French Head of State and a British royal" (supposedly Princess Diana.) Such was his prowess that half of France kind of believed it had happened!

But when Sciolino offered insights on French women I sat up and paid attention. French women go lightly on the make-up - if they do their eyes, they don't wear lipstick. You have to decide what you want to highlight that day -- and which goes better with what you plan to wear.

Perfume is to be used so lightly that only the person kissing your cheek can smell it. Your scent is meant to evoke memories of yourself in an intimate situation, i.e. being kissed hello or goodbye.

The great Coco Chanel once remarked thoughtfully, "A woman without perfume is a woman without a future." She didn't live in Southern California where every fifth person screams about their allergies...