Monday, May 31, 2010

Presidential Longevity and Other Matters

Perhaps I got off on this because today - Memorial Day -- we salute those whose longevity was savagely cut short.

Bess Truman was our oldest living First Lady; she died age 97, after having lived through five wars and 18 presidents. Gerald Ford, who died aged 93, was our oldest living ex-President.

Lady Bird Johnson ranks second to Truman, dying age 94. But we may have a dark horse in the field -- Betty Ford is 92.

But for longevity actually in the White House, Eleanor Roosevelt tops them all -- 12 years at that address.

Livening up Dinner Table Conversation

Yesterday, Bob, Pat and "Raffish" gathered around the dining room table here for an indoor picnic. Raffish is a medical doctor and it occurred to me in a flash -- "Raffish, if you were in some extremely dire situation and you had to eat another human being, which part would be the best?"

Bob and Pat gasped, reeling back from the table in horror.

He grinned and said, "The ribs. Most of the muscles in the body run longitudinally, but the ribs work" (twisting his torso) "like this so they get the least exercise and are the most tender."

Pat eyed Bob speculatively, reached over and patted his embonpoint and said, "Bob, you'd better watch out! You could be someone's dinner!"

"Nah," I said diplomatically, "He's too fat! (warming to the subject) and Pat, there's no meat on you at all! You're safe!"

Bob, who is 85, fought back. "But I'm well-aged!" he shot back defiantly. (We were shrieking with laughter) "... and probably well-marbled, too!" That nearly put us on the floor, helpless with laughter.

Yes, we do have enlightening conversations at the table. And now you know what to eat and who not to eat.

No comments: