One Thing Leads to Another - Hence This:

 It is my contention that "nursing homes" deliberately condition patients to become incontinent (bed wetters) as a matter of course......  

How they do it? The  home while the patient is a little out of it, slips them into an adult diaper.  Thus when the addled, but dry patient rings the buzzer for a trip to the bathroom with the nurse, said functionary can return with this pithy (deliberate) instruction - "Oh, just go in your pants."

When you have demand, you will also find money which roused a vivid mental picture of Mafia vs. Corporate Greed over expensive lunches in exotic venues - Aruba is said to be a popular "Get to know you," place.  

"But that's expensive!" you cry.  Back comes the retort:  "Nursing homes' population is 75 per cent incontinent," and even wholesale, sell as follows - sample  

Women - 30 count package $15.78   Male - 32 count $16.99

The Mafia rep - DiDi Di Fontanina and the CEO - a Cabot Lodge I seem to remember - stretch in the Aruban sun.  Cocktails and dinner with a planned stop for an undie change.  Their saying is "If you're pushing a product, you use it,"  DiDi said only recently.  It was on the flight to Paris.  One of their designers was having an engineering problem on the mens' scrotum pouch sample. His models don't understand his French and there have been some heated discussions during the fitting sessions.  

But no one is incontinent.

Rehab? RUN! Scam

All live-in rehabs are scams.  Personal experience:  1 hour (if that) rehab done a day and then you spend the next 23 hours and eat 3 meals a day.  Much better to stay home and go to them on an appt. basis.  There is absolutely no reason to move in there for an hour of "stand up; sit down"  "pull the giant rubber band between your hands." 

Especially if during the night, as you froth and rage in your three bed "suite" you are subject to The Howler which is a woman (usually") screaming in desperation, "Nurse!'  "Somebody help me!"

Marie Antoinette on the Platform issuing last pleas for clemency. .

Up and down the hall her misery it went while she lay fluffed up in her warm soft bed.  (I will give them that - a comfortable bed.  I finally drifted off - is THAT why it was named Driftingawaywood?  All of us were ready to drive the hearse that would take her elsewhere. 

 And soon!

Someone says "Rehab"? RUN

 I spent nearly 6 months in various of the above.  Safely home where they don't want to take my blood pressure every time I blink, I hope to give any remaining readers here a tour - what I saw, thoughts and sheer horror - 

First on the program is an outpost named Driftwood which wags like us immediately changed to Drif ting away wood a real bitch to type.  The place is ghastly, too.  More of which in the future.

A PASSION FOR PASTRY

 Richie and and I saw it and never managed to actually go in.  Our loss has been amended with yesterday's visit to Sweet Wheat, which is an authentic French Patisseriurveyors of such as baguettes, country sour dough a French tradition.  It lived up to it's authenticity.  Get your languid butts in there for a bit of crisp but chewy baguette the chewy being a hallmark  of French bread.  Combine it with Lovely French butter (available at Ralph's)

Other delicacies include (but are not limited to such as) tarts, macarons) $6)   They have a nice open counter of wines and champagne - you want authentic?  pop the cork!

Read the menu at  sweet heat bakery  Now go back on your diet.  

as if.

When Too Soon is.

 The Christmas tree lot has it's fencing  going up.

When is 'way too soon too soonWHEN THE cHRIST MAS TREE LOT is filling up!

Cost me - I slipped and fell on our wooden living room floor - and broke my left hip; followed by surgery  and then 2 weeks in physical therapy for another 10 days.  Now I am blessedily home and damned happy to be here.  Many were the events in rehab all to be related soon but this go around with hip repair has taken more out of me than I had thought it would.  

Apparently the only thing you bring home from physical therapy

Is incontinence  and it is by no means welcome.  More on Drifting Awaywood tomorrow